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Grass skirts! ah yes locusts and Goats soon make them shorter.
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I may have been a first aid trainer but I'm not that qualified. I know my place. |
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And Bunkers is cheap up there too - I don't know how they do it. |
Permission to join the ship Sir?
Having read through the thread, I think I may be of some use on your perilous adventure. I don't have a lot of experience on large vessels, whether they be monohulls or catamarans, but I do have lots of experience on small vessels and how to keep them afloat on the foaming deep. I've also done some sailing in my time, and although I have full confidence in Chief Engineer TMac mastering the intricacies of his modern mechanical marvels, it may be prudent to have someone aboard who can rig a few rags here and there in the rigging if we ever come to a sudden shuddering heave to in the middle of the ocean. For example, if we happen to be running downwind when the mechanical elastic bands break, I could jury rig a couple of spinnakers from the foremast to keep us moving, that is if Red-17 could loan me the top half of a bikini. After all, it is vitally important that we make landfall before the bars close. I could also help maintain the rigging, as I have spliced a few Mainbraces in my time, and I used to be reasonably skilful with fancy rope work like Turk's Heads and Monkey fists and all that stuff. Also, if we ever fetch up in the Channel and we need to go round Start Point, you will need someone to stop us scraping the barnacles off on the Skerries Bank. Oh, and I'm sure the ship's football team will be OK too, with all these West Ham United supporters on board, 'cos we know how football should be played. (Not that we've won very much in our long history.) Yep, I'm a Hammers fan too, and have stood on the old North Bank at the Boleyn Ground. |
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It sounds like you have some useful skills, the Monkey's Paw bit scares me, those little fellahs don't let go, and they will grab for anything that dangles. |
[QUOTE=Dartskipper;714]Permission to join the ship Sir?
I've also done some sailing in my time, and although I have full confidence in Chief Engineer TMac mastering the intricacies of his modern mechanical marvels, it may be prudent to have someone aboard who can rig a few rags here and there in the rigging if we ever come to a sudden shuddering heave to in the middle of the ocean. For example, if we happen to be running downwind when the mechanical elastic bands break, I could jury rig a couple of spinnakers from the foremast to keep us moving, that is if Red-17 could loan me the top half of a bikini. Welcome aboard Dartskipper, You have every right to have full confidence in Tmac, he can master the intricacies of many things, not just the mechanical marvel thingies??? :p I would gladly lend you the top half of my bikini Dartskipper but I fear you would have a lot of trouble generating enough wind power from them. Why is it that everyone seems interested in using the top half of my bikini for one thing or another? :rolleyes: |
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It is so nice to be back on board. |
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Hi to Pats our lady boatswain. are you back aboard. Red-17 is deck supervisor pro temp. sure she will glad of female company.
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I have CCTV cameras everywhere on this ship. nothing gets passed me.
pop into my suite for a drink after your watch and I'll show you how things work aboard. As deck supervisor it will be useful for you to know. |
[QUOTE=Red-17;720]
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Anyway, give a sailmaker any old bits of cloth, some thread and a needle, and you would be surprised at what he can stitch up in short order. (Including the deckie learner dumb enough to buy it from him.):) |
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We didn't use thrusters in my last boat. I used to get the deckhand to push on the handrail near the bow if I wanted to go sideways.....;) Mind you, that boat handled like a nightmare. If you went from full ahead to full astern, the control lever would come away in your hand,and the rudder would go hard over making the wheel spin really fast and whack you in the shins. I hope our Chief has everything tight as a drum down below. |
Is my old position still available, Sir William, Sir. Not the missionary position. :D
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When you work it out, might I suggest, now that Pat, (hello Pat), is back that you won't need two deck supervisors. I would be happy to look after the garden area and when Farmer John is away I can look after the feral animals. :D If Pat needs a hand with anything or is on shore leave I can pitch in and help. How does that sound Skipper, Skipper, Skipper ? Question: Isn't Dartskipper a butterfly? :rolleyes: |
Hello Pats. w2e are all very happy to have you back aboard. Yes you are still our Lady Bosun. Meet another Lady, Red-17. she is deck supervisor pending promotion. sure she will be happy you are here too. i think she was getting a little worried with all us red blooded men around ha ha.
Tannoy: now here this!.. Our lady Bosun has returned. So, no pinching stuff from the Bosuns store. |
Eh?? Missionary??...we got a Padre aboard??...LOL
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I have found the crew bar but where's the stock?
Doesn't anyone do stock control? Yes I know, you just drink it and let someone else worry about the trivialities. Well, as luck would have it there is one of those floating blocks of flats not far away. With the Captain's permission I will take a boat and see what I can scrounge - They must have loads on there and I am quite sure that they would be happy to help another vessel in distress. If I get caught I might be gone for a couple of weeks. |
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Bit like a pirate ship in a way -- the crew have the say in the general running of the ship (responsibilities include attending all parties) Sir William and I generally confer with an agent somewhere to generate funds, but anyone can have input in that direction. Just like a pirate ship the entire crew benefits from loot which enables us all to continue in this mad cap voyage through our dotage. :cool::cool: |
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