virtual crazy gang, part II

billyboy · #**2301** 14th February 2018, 11:53

Look at this guy Tom. he short and has a little wheel on his ceremonial sword heh heh

YM-Mundrabilla · #**2302** 14th February 2018, 12:43

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

I think I am being wound up by Sir William here but I suppose he is used to using a key to open up his spam cans!

Anyway, Mr Bullied learned his trade from Sir Nigel (who of course in turn picked up some hints from Mr. Bugatti).

Ah.....the double chime whistle of No.9 when she is going at full chat! I can still hear it.

McC

You would need a tin opener to fix the appearance of both Gresley and Bulleid's finest.

billyboy · #**2303** 14th February 2018, 13:18

.

Quote:

Originally Posted by YM-Mundrabilla

You would need a tin opener to fix the appearance of both Gresley and Bulleid's finest.

Farmer John · #**2304** 14th February 2018, 14:29

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

It will probably be a good idea if some others join the pantomime - and don't forget the telescopes either!

Stewards (plastic or otherwise) please set up the lounge with appropriate drinks and smally-eats.

Engineering Department please try and minimise loud noises - although the Chief is welcome to join us if he can find his gold braided overalls!

McC

Right, got the tea cosey on my head sideways, with the foil off a pot of yoghurt looking very smart as a decoration. Tube out of a kitchen roll stuck inside tube out of a bog roll all smartened up with tinfoil for a telescope. Look like some mighty sea warrior. Ready for welcoming the visitors.

Farmer John · #**2305** 14th February 2018, 14:39

It is all about making an impression, as soon as they are all at the top of the ladder......

FFFFaaaaRRRNNNNN

Don't blink, extend the tea tray with the biscuits and say

"Welcome aboard, gentlemen".

They look a little dazed, smile smile smile

That's how we welcome them aboard the Golden Dreamer!

Dartskipper · #**2306** 14th February 2018, 17:37

Make sure they wipe their shoes on the new coconut matting at the top of the gangway. We don't want any footprints on our pristine teak decks. (Although footprints might be useful in tracking down miscreants committing any minor, or even major, misdemeanours.)

billyboy · #**2307** 14th February 2018, 22:56

well I do have my false beard on (copied from a players packet).

Greetings Gentlemen. Welcome aboard my yacht. I do hope you enjoy your stay with us. Please follow me to our lounge and bar area please.
Steward! what ever these good gentlemen would like goes on my tab if you dont mind.

Screws?...two!....Propulsion units?...4, Type classified. Speed?...classified!. Engine room? beneath us and out of bounds in the interest of National security. Now Gentlemen if there are no more questions may I suggest a snack to go with your drinks.

billyboy · #**2308** 14th February 2018, 22:59

Ah you good sir must be the Vice Admiral. Looking splendid if I may say so. Actually My Medical officer (i think you call them sick bay tiffys) should be along shortly. I know she is looking forward to meeting you. RED 17!! dfo come in and meet the Vice Admiral.

Tom Alexander · #**2309** 15th February 2018, 06:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by billyboy

at least I am not the only supporter aboard then....LOL

Supporter? Heck - I was born in the Howard's Road maternity hospital in West Ham. (Up the 'ammers!!) It , the hospital, had started a mid-wifery education program in the early 1930's, I believe. The TV program "Call the Midwife" was set in neighbouring Poplar. The ship in the opening titles of that show is the Shaw, Savill & Albion Line (affectionately known as "Sure Sh1t and Shovel) liner QSMV Dominion Monarch in dry dock at the King George V Dock and the road is Saville Road, Silvertown, East London. Many of the exterior scenes are shot at the Chatham Historic Dockyard.

Tom Alexander · #**2310** 15th February 2018, 06:27

Quote:

Originally Posted by billyboy

well I do have my false beard on (copied from a players packet).

Greetings Gentlemen. Welcome aboard my yacht. I do hope you enjoy your stay with us. Please follow me to our lounge and bar area please.
Steward! what ever these good gentlemen would like goes on my tab if you dont mind.

Screws?...two!....Propulsion units?...4, Type classified. Speed?...classified!. Engine room? beneath us and out of bounds in the interest of National security. Now Gentlemen if there are no more questions may I suggest a snack to go with your drinks.

We don't want to say anything but I seem to recall installing a third screw when we were in drydock 2 years ago. It was expecially configured to eliminate the screw race, --- good for silent running, along with the Caterpillar drives we copied from the Red Oktober.

billyboy · #**2311** 15th February 2018, 10:43

quite right Tom. thats why I told them only 2. cant be too careful with these guys and their questions eh!

Farmer John · #**2312** 15th February 2018, 14:34

I, too, have been questioned by our visitors about our vessel, it's propulsion, engines and it's motion through the water. They wished to know what fish I would compare it to. If they ask, don't tell them Pike.

Snow on their boots.

McCloggie · #**2313** 15th February 2018, 15:14

I think the only way to deal with this is to have a full Mess Dinner and get them back to the collage before they find about out the GD and her exceptional properties.

Apologies to those in tea cosies (great effort that worked well it has to be said) and bog roll telescopes, but if we want to leave here without any further problems and questions about the ship/crew , my advice is that we show them that we are better than they are.

I know we can do this!

Dartskipper can arrange some good local seafood. I will ensure that we get some local venison for a main course and will instruct our Chief Seward/Chef that we must have a Champagne Sorbet for dessert.

If there are any problems, Red can deal with the Vice Admiral!

McC

Farmer John · #**2314** 15th February 2018, 17:39

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

I think the only way to deal with this is to have a full Mess Dinner and get them back to the collage before they find about out the GD and her exceptional properties.

Apologies to those in tea cosies (great effort that worked well it has to be said) and bog roll telescopes, but if we want to leave here without any further problems and questions about the ship/crew , my advice is that we show them that we are better than they are.

I know we can do this!

Dartskipper can arrange some good local seafood. I will ensure that we get some local venison for a main course and will instruct our Chief Seward/Chef that we must have a Champagne Sorbet for dessert.

If there are any problems, Red can deal with the Vice Admiral!

McC

Not to be dismissive to the visitors, but they don't have the science background to understand some of the principles behind the GD. Brian Cox and Stephen Hawking said they would go to the foot of the stairs, they couldn't follow it and they can do the crossword in the Beano. If these fellows really are from a collage they will come to a sticky end anyway.

If you wish to speak to me about the stores and menus, I will be happy to consider your thoughts, but I am not sure about a Champignon Sorebit, isn't that like dhobi itch?

Yours, FJ, Chief Stewart.

Dartskipper · #**2315** 15th February 2018, 21:42

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

I think the only way to deal with this is to have a full Mess Dinner.

I know we can do this!

Dartskipper can arrange some good local seafood.

If there are any problems, Red can deal with the Vice Admiral!

McC

I'll get on the RT and check if any Brixham trawlers are heading in. We can buy their catch on Sir William's platinum credit card by offering a better price than they would get at the market. (One skipper I know would be happy to make some real money!)There is the chance of some fresh crab too if there's a boat unloading at Kingswear jetty.

billyboy · #**2316** 16th February 2018, 05:40

Speaking of Crabs, seen how one of our visitors keeps scratching? ...Mybe he just come back from Spice Island heh heh heh

Tom Alexander · #**2317** 16th February 2018, 06:14

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

I think the only way to deal with this is to have a full Mess Dinner and get them back to the collage before they find about out the GD and her exceptional properties.

Apologies to those in tea cosies (great effort that worked well it has to be said) and bog roll telescopes, but if we want to leave here without any further problems and questions about the ship/crew , my advice is that we show them that we are better than they are.

I know we can do this!

Dartskipper can arrange some good local seafood. I will ensure that we get some local venison for a main course and will instruct our Chief Seward/Chef that we must have a Champagne Sorbet for dessert.

If there are any problems, Red can deal with the Vice Admiral!

McC

Venison!! Great idea --- haven't had any of that for over a week now. (No kidding!)

Also get some home made deer sausage once in a while. Moose isn't too bad as long as it hasn't run after being shot. If is has run it's pretty game, but edible when marinated in tomato juice and onions. Elk OK as well -- all three need less time on the Barbie otherwise they dry out too much.

billyboy · #**2318** 16th February 2018, 08:12

( had some beautifully marinaded Kangeroo steaks a few weeks ago. very nice, slightly gamie.

YM-Mundrabilla · #**2319** 16th February 2018, 09:20

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

Venison!! Great idea --- haven't had any of that for over a week now. (No kidding!)

Also get some home made deer sausage once in a while. Moose isn't too bad as long as it hasn't run after being shot. If is has run it's pretty game, but edible when marinated in tomato juice and onions. Elk OK as well -- all three need less time on the Barbie otherwise they dry out too much.

The YMs's contribution.
How could you eat Bamby and/or Skippy?

Farmer John · #**2320** 16th February 2018, 09:25

Quote:

Originally Posted by YM-Mundrabilla

The YMs's contribution.
How could you eat Bamby and/or Skippy?

Oh, there are lots of recipes, but something simple that doesn't dry the meat too much.

McCloggie · #**2321** 16th February 2018, 09:55

Speaking of Crabs, seen how one of our visitors keeps scratching? ...Mybe he just come back from Spice Island heh heh heh

Come on Sir William - he is the RAF representative!

A full explanation will be given if required!!!!

McC

McCloggie · #**2322** 16th February 2018, 09:58

How could you eat Bamby and/or Skippy?

Very easily, I assure you!

McC

billyboy · #**2323** 16th February 2018, 10:07

Quote:

Originally Posted by McCloggie

Speaking of Crabs, seen how one of our visitors keeps scratching? ...Mybe he just come back from Spice Island heh heh heh

Come on Sir William - he is the RAF representative!

A full explanation will be given if required!!!!

McC

Oh I get easily confused these days. I even thought an insulated screw was a WAAF in rubber boots.

McCloggie · #**2324** 16th February 2018, 10:16

The RAF was formed on 01-Apr-1918 - nobody has had the heart yet to tell them it was only a joke!

Their uniforms came from an order of uniforms originally destined for the Imperial Russian forces but of course they became surplus to requirements after the October revolution so they went to the new RAF.

Unfortunately, the colour now known as "RAF blue" was exactly the same as the ointment Red would have doled out to Jolly Jack if he had an infestation of crab lice in the nether regions! Hence the nickname.

Inter service rivalry. Childish I know - but still fun and they are still referred to as "the Crabs"!

McC

Farmer John · #**2325** 16th February 2018, 15:09

See, a bit of fun and a bit of history. I do love it.