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virtual crazy gang, part II

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  #276  
Old 27th April 2017, 13:23
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I am finding that a quiet turn on the bridge with Dartskipper is very calming, just what I need.

I'll just make a report to him.

Red and Green lights dead ahead, holding steady, OOW, we have just about enough sea-room to dive.
If both red 'n green you see in front, Full Ahead and have a shunt.

(Now, come on. You thought I was going to be rude didn't you?)
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  #277  
Old 27th April 2017, 14:07
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Took me so long to read all the posts that it's now tomorrow already -- turning in.
I know. I posted last night; reading this morning and now it's time for work.
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  #278  
Old 27th April 2017, 14:37
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I know. I posted last night; reading this morning and now it's time for work.
Work.. ain't that a four letter word???
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  #279  
Old 27th April 2017, 15:13
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Work.. ain't that a four letter word???
So is Sloth, if no-one works who will keep me.

(Answers on a postcard)
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  #280  
Old 27th April 2017, 16:46
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Pat's can I have Dibs on one of the Pirate Uniforms, just as a spare, y'know. Do you have one with 2 eye-patches? I could catch up on my sleep.

Red-17, the ship will refurbish the fruit on the Carmen Miranda outfit if you promise not to sing all the time.
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  #281  
Old 27th April 2017, 20:16
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Ah, I see what you did there, Sir William, I had forgotten we can do corners. I was too busy thinking about the Marmite. Steady back on course, the safety of the ship is paramount.

Where are we going? Just wondered.
VMT for holding the Bridge while I was otherwise occupied FJ. I knew I could rely on the watch to take care of any emergencies.

(Wasn't the old adage,

"If ahead is green and red,
Scream and shout and lose your head?")

To answer your enquiry about where we are going, we are proceeding to our destination, of course. (Alternatively, off course.)

Carry on FJ.
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  #282  
Old 27th April 2017, 20:23
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For those members of the crew and domestic team who aren't that interested in watching the fighting on the ice rink, our entertainments officer has informed me that he has arranged for an exhibition tennis match to be played on the upper deck aft of the swimming pool. He has instructed the deck gang to build a clay court for the match to be played on. He has also arranged for our intrepid military chopper jockey to fetch the two participants from that passing cruise liner. They are those very well known Russian tennis stars, Hannah Gruntalotski and Maria Shriekitova. Arrangements have also been made with a sub clause in their contracts that should we pass through a tropical storm during the match, they are to stop playing tennis immediately and start mud wrestling instead.
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  #283  
Old 27th April 2017, 20:31
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Tom, I am steering for the storm, hoping of course to miss it.
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  #284  
Old 27th April 2017, 20:47
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Now, Buys Ballots law, let's see, stand with your back to the fire, the front door is on the left if you have been eating your toast and Marmite.

Where's the Marmite gone? Oh well we'll just imagine we are in the Northern hemisphere, I think that should be right.
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  #285  
Old 27th April 2017, 21:25
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..... Where's the Marmite gone? Oh well we'll just imagine we are in the Northern hemisphere, I think that should be right.
Bugger the marmite.. we're a Bovril house.. have a supply of it (hopefully) coming next week from Zuid Afrika...
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  #286  
Old 27th April 2017, 21:28
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Bugger the marmite.. we're a Bovril house.. have a supply of it (hopefully) coming next week from Zuid Afrika...
That's a different kettle of salt, I can enjoy that too. But it doesn't tell you which hemisphere you are in.
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  #287  
Old 27th April 2017, 21:50
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That's a different kettle of salt, I can enjoy that too. But it doesn't tell you which hemisphere you are in.
Ah.. some things shall remain a mystery, dontcha see...
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  #288  
Old 27th April 2017, 23:29
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For those members of the crew and domestic team who aren't that interested in watching the fighting on the ice rink, our entertainments officer has informed me that he has arranged for an exhibition tennis match to be played on the upper deck aft of the swimming pool. He has instructed the deck gang to build a clay court for the match to be played on. He has also arranged for our intrepid military chopper jockey to fetch the two participants from that passing cruise liner. They are those very well known Russian tennis stars, Hannah Gruntalotski and Maria Shriekitova. Arrangements have also been made with a sub clause in their contracts that should we pass through a tropical storm during the match, they are to stop playing tennis immediately and start mud wrestling instead.
Hmmmmmm...mud wrestling eh!...theres tasty look you!
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  #289  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:17
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Pat's can I have Dibs on one of the Pirate Uniforms, just as a spare, y'know. Do you have one with 2 eye-patches? I could catch up on my sleep.

Red-17, the ship will refurbish the fruit on the Carmen Miranda outfit if you promise not to sing all the time.
Thanks for the offer of refurbishment of the hat. If I promise not to sing all the time can I at least hum most of the time? I am already practising Cuanto Le Gusta. It could almost be a song written especially for the crew of the GD. (If you are interested you can get the lyrics from Mr Google.)
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  #290  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:20
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VMT, OOW? Remember, not all of us come from a seafaring background and I am beginning to wonder if some of you aren't just making them up.
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  #291  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:25
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OK, so what's with Marmite, Vegemite, Bovril? Are there any other such spreads that we can add to the list? The three listed all have three things in common, they can be spread on toast, made into a broth solution and to the uninitiated can taste pretty vile.
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  #292  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:27
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If both red 'n green you see in front, Full Ahead and have a shunt.

(Now, come on. You thought I was going to be rude didn't you?)
It was almost a foregone conclusion.
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  #293  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:43
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Work.. ain't that a four letter word???
Yeah, it's a necessary evil, I fear.
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  #294  
Old 28th April 2017, 01:50
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Pat's can I have Dibs on one of the Pirate Uniforms, just as a spare, y'know. Do you have one with 2 eye-patches? I could catch up on my sleep.
Yes, of course, Farmer John. Consider the Pirate uniform yours. Stop by my office and we'll do the necessary "fitting". No giggling, now. Would you prefer a sleep mask to the 2 eye-patches? I have one. It's pink with lace trim. Don't mind the oily fingerprints.
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  #295  
Old 28th April 2017, 02:33
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??? lot of noise from Hold No1...They must be winning again.

Morning Tom. Whats out ETA at the next Port mate?

Thought Dart skipper was into Stars last night when he said he was studying Heavenly bodies. Turnrd out he was looking at the CCTV screens....Sigh! and I missed it!...heh heh heh
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  #296  
Old 28th April 2017, 10:08
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Are pets, other than Pat's chooks and the sheep in Red's care in the garden of course, allowed on board the GD? If so, I would like to bring my latest pet on board as "ship's dragon" for the enjoyment of all.

He/she/it only eats the odd chook and/or sheep occasionally. As an added advantage he/she/it would be quite prepared to replace the naked lady on the bow so that we would be in full compliance with the latest Discrimination and Harassment laws.
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  #297  
Old 28th April 2017, 10:26
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??? lot of noise from Hold No1...They must be winning again.

Morning Tom. Whats out ETA at the next Port mate?

Thought Dart skipper was into Stars last night when he said he was studying Heavenly bodies. Turnrd out he was looking at the CCTV screens....Sigh! and I missed it!...heh heh heh
Yeah, I was practicing sending semaphore messages at night when I discovered the flags aren't luminous. I shall have to hand them over to Tmac so that he can hang them up to dry next to his nuclear reaction impulse propelling thingy in the hope they pick up some radiation and become visible in the dark. That's when I started studying the celestial bodies on that electronic observation system. I was very careful to wipe the screen clean again when I had finished. If you let your spilt cocoa go cold, it sets like concrete. This shipboard variety has all the properties of rapid setting runway repair cement.
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  #298  
Old 28th April 2017, 10:35
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Originally Posted by Red-17 View Post
OK, so what's with Marmite, Vegemite, Bovril? Are there any other such spreads that we can add to the list? The three listed all have three things in common, they can be spread on toast, made into a broth solution and to the uninitiated can taste pretty vile.
Shippams made a large variety of savoury spreads. Lots of sea food based stuff that we used to spread on our white bread or toast, or for a Sunday treat, cream crackers.
They also made what they called beef spread and other stuff from the by products of four legged mammals that wandered into the slaughter house and didn't successfully arrive at the other end in one piece. I think Shippams actually had a 1,000 gallon vat of the stuff bubbling away in their factory, and put into those little glass jars, and then stuck different labels on to fool us that this jar tasted different to that jar. If you closed your eyes it all tasted the same.

Keep an eye on the chickens, Pat. Chicken spread was one of their best sellers.
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  #299  
Old 28th April 2017, 10:37
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I think a Dragon would not be a good idea. whoever heard of a Bar-B-Qed dragon?

Red-17, can you draw some red and green paraffin from Pats store for our navigation lights please?
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  #300  
Old 28th April 2017, 16:54
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Shippams made a large variety of savoury spreads. Lots of sea food based stuff that we used to spread on our white bread or toast, or for a Sunday treat, cream crackers.
They also made what they called beef spread and other stuff from the by products of four legged mammals that wandered into the slaughter house and didn't successfully arrive at the other end in one piece. I think Shippams actually had a 1,000 gallon vat of the stuff bubbling away in their factory, and put into those little glass jars, and then stuck different labels on to fool us that this jar tasted different to that jar. If you closed your eyes it all tasted the same.

Keep an eye on the chickens, Pat. Chicken spread was one of their best sellers.
Did you see Shippam's Guide to the Opera? "Shippam's for tea, for tea for tea....."

I suppose one might say it's forteasimo.
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