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virtual crazy gang, part II

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  #1776  
Old 6th December 2017, 03:57
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I know that Tmac1720 is a very experienced and competent engineer but I was not aware that he was also into carpentry. I saw him trying to juggle a 12" x 2" x about 12 foot plank into his funnel suite the other night. No idea what the plank was for, however. Perhaps he is making those Russian dolls for orphans at some of our previous ports of call.
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  #1777  
Old 6th December 2017, 07:08
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I know that Tmac1720 is a very experienced and competent engineer but I was not aware that he was also into carpentry. I saw him trying to juggle a 12" x 2" x about 12 foot plank into his funnel suite the other night. No idea what the plank was for, however. Perhaps he is making those Russian dolls for orphans at some of our previous ports of call.
Perhaps (more likely) he is going to coerce some cutouts to lash it over the side by the entry port and then suggest the MAA go for an evening stroll. Thus, staying in his cabin might be a good idea for the next hour or so. (That Black Bush is a powerful sedative) In the meantime, I think he will find, like most cabins aboard, that if you push the "open" button on the Blue Ray player for the 60" flat screen TV a lower cabinet door will open to expose two bottles of Laphroiag 18 years old with some crystal glasses. (Hopefully the heathen won'tdare put ice cubes, or water into that ) AND if he tells anyone, it'll be standing room only in there with all the visitors.

Last edited by Tom Alexander; 6th December 2017 at 07:15.
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  #1778  
Old 6th December 2017, 08:07
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Never been game to press even the go button on my Blue Ray thingy as it is RED..........but I might now have a go at the lower cabinet door with a jemmy rather than risk pressing any red buttons.
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  #1779  
Old 6th December 2017, 09:57
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A word in MAA's defence your honor
he is new to our set up in the bridge. he needed to slow the Port engine to enable us to make a turn. Seeing the red button he though that was for the Port engine and pressed it.
I rest my case (of Black bush) by the engine room door.
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  #1780  
Old 6th December 2017, 14:48
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Um well I suppose it is the season of good will after all so in the spirit of the season I shall don my big white beard and red boilersuit and dispense largess to the rest of the crew and forgive them the error of their ways.... this is a ONE TIME only offer mind... any more unauthorised pushing of the BIG RED button shall incur the wrath of the Gods (me with large Stilson) upon the miscreants head.......... and a Merry Christmas to you all, bah humbug. (sorry couldn't resist that as I have an image to maintain )
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  #1781  
Old 6th December 2017, 16:01
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Phew! That is a relief!!!

I will make my may to the bar full of thanks, apologies (and Laphroig) to Tmac and his crew and thanks also to Sir William for his mitigation. I will NEVER press a big red button again until I know what it does!

I must also thank Sir William for his advice - closed regulator, wound cut off to zero, applied brakes and wound cut off back to astern! In other words, pushed the levers backwards.

Let me lick my wounds and I am up for the next port of call.

McC
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  #1782  
Old 6th December 2017, 22:21
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Is it safe to go out on deck now?

I was just starting to shower, but lost my balance when the deck started going like the clappers. I tried grabbing something to hold on to, but the shower curtain wasn't attached securely enough to the overhead rail. I tripped over the damn thing, and hopping around on one foot while trying to keep my balance, I eventually fetched up with the other foot jammed down the heads, and one hand trying to stem the sudden flood of cold water jetting out of where the wash basin faucet used to be. (That came off in my hand as well.) I managed to reach under the basin and found a valve on a pipe that looked promising, so I turned it until the water stopped gushing. After a while, the torrent stopped, but I'm not sure that this is because the valve actually worked, or the fresh water service tank has run dry. Anyway, the deck in the bathroom is much cleaner now. Bright as a new pin.
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  #1783  
Old 7th December 2017, 06:39
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Is it safe to go out on deck now?

I was just starting to shower, but lost my balance when the deck started going like the clappers. I tried grabbing something to hold on to, but the shower curtain wasn't attached securely enough to the overhead rail. I tripped over the damn thing, and hopping around on one foot while trying to keep my balance, I eventually fetched up with the other foot jammed down the heads, and one hand trying to stem the sudden flood of cold water jetting out of where the wash basin faucet used to be. (That came off in my hand as well.) I managed to reach under the basin and found a valve on a pipe that looked promising, so I turned it until the water stopped gushing. After a while, the torrent stopped, but I'm not sure that this is because the valve actually worked, or the fresh water service tank has run dry. Anyway, the deck in the bathroom is much cleaner now. Bright as a new pin.
Oh! We'll get 'Ealf and Safety on your predicament right away. (On the GD, that is comprised of Sir William, Tmac and myself where we convene as a board and accept bribes of Four Bells rum, or Black Bush as specified by each board member in order to find in your favour. Settlement is usually 2 rink side tickets to the next hockey game in #1 hold. (The heated seat area.)
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  #1784  
Old 7th December 2017, 06:45
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(That came off in my hand as well.)

What was it that you were doing in the shower?
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  #1785  
Old 7th December 2017, 12:30
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I think he was winding his automatic watch Tom
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  #1786  
Old 7th December 2017, 20:48
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I think that the hair of the dog recipe I was taught by John from Paignton may have been partly responsible for my discomfiture. I'm sure I remembered it correctly. John said it was his favourite coffee and rum recipe. I made it in a large mug, starting with a spoonful of Maxwell House instant coffee, a measure of Wood's Rum, two measures of Tia Maria, three measures of Kahlua, four spoonsful of Demerara sugar, five spoonsful of condensed milk, topped up with hot water. On reflection, I think the ingredients were correct, but I may have got the numbers wrong.
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  #1787  
Old 7th December 2017, 20:49
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What was it that you were doing in the shower?
Errrmm... tee hee.....
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  #1788  
Old 8th December 2017, 00:51
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See wgat a clean crew i have readers!...they all like to spend time in the showers.
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  #1789  
Old 8th December 2017, 05:57
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Mr. McCloggie -- Would you be so kind as to muster all the shore parties and have the cutouts transport them back to the GD. Leaving first thing ( 1:30 p.m. after the usual leaving port full English breakfast celebration). Destination Horta on the island of Fayal (Faial) in the Azores.

Tmac, seeing as we have been anchored in the Mona Passage, may we assume your injuns are still on standby??
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  #1790  
Old 8th December 2017, 09:33
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I am back.....sniff sniff....Oh, smell that Bacon cooking. Our chef is really on the ball.
Fresh coffee pot and rum bottle please steward. Must have the correct blood alcohol level for a nice departure eh!
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  #1791  
Old 8th December 2017, 12:24
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Tmac, seeing as we have been anchored in the Mona Passage, may we assume your injuns are still on standby??
Injuns are always on standby, ready for our usual quick getaway Just take the handbrake off select first gear and awayyyyyyyyyy we go
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  #1792  
Old 8th December 2017, 14:08
McCloggie Malaysia McCloggie is offline
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Tom A:

The cut outs (with my help I hasten to add) have been able to muster (round up) all crew members that were ashore - apart from Varley!

Sir William is in his usual seat, Tmac and his crew are on standby, DS appears to have extracted himself from the heads/showers but I have to report that Varley remains absent.

We will continue to follow our enquiries with the local police, dubious bars etc. right up to sailing time but I have instructed the cut outs to be all back on board prior to sailing.

Discipline! That is what we must have here!

If he misses the ship he is on his own!

I will be in the bar if anyone wants to discuss this.

McC
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  #1793  
Old 8th December 2017, 17:17
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McC, Varley just transmits himself in when he wants, very talented man. Can't say much about this, bit hush hush.
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  #1794  
Old 9th December 2017, 04:57
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[II'll be in sick bay if needed. Darn Allergy knocking me about again....hate getting old.[/I]
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  #1795  
Old 9th December 2017, 06:02
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Well if everyone is happy with Varley in his Harry Potter self apperating mode, then I can report that everyone is on board.

McC
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  #1796  
Old 9th December 2017, 06:49
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[II'll be in sick bay if needed. Darn Allergy knocking me about again....hate getting old.[/I]
Oh! No!! Don't tell me that incontinence is an allergy -- I always thought I didn't have any allergies.
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  #1797  
Old 9th December 2017, 06:53
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OK you bridge wallahs -- Green button and head North -- more or less heading for Faial.

MAA - please get the Cutouts to string fishing lines abaft. Should be able to catch enough for a good fry up. Chippy Potatoes ready from Mary's garden. Ditto Mushy peas. (Needless to say to be washed down with the brew of your choice.)
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  #1798  
Old 9th December 2017, 09:15
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My kind of menu Tom...LOL
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  #1799  
Old 9th December 2017, 11:01
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Fishing lines deployed aft as requested TA.

The Cutouts seem to landing a good few fish, but some very weird looking specimens.

Did you expect one stamped "WD 1940 Mk II High Explosive"? It is a big b****r, pointy head and a strange propeller for a tail.

I hope Chef knows what is what.

McC
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  #1800  
Old 9th December 2017, 11:34
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Fishing lines deployed aft as requested TA.

The Cutouts seem to landing a good few fish, but some very weird looking specimens.

Did you expect one stamped "WD 1940 Mk II High Explosive"? It is a big b****r, pointy head and a strange propeller for a tail.

I hope Chef knows what is what.

McC
throw that one back...VERY GENTLY!!
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