KR, Yes, not very inspiring was it. Rather like Samuel J's comment about women and preaching (apologies Patricia Ann). Musicologically difficult I have no doubt but not worth the bandwidth to download (which second time around it did).

(Of course, a reciprocally happy Easter to you as well).

Chief? I read elsewhere the Second is looking for another berth. If he wants to drop out perhaps we should rig up the platform from which he will demonstrate this feat. 2 metres should be high enough to discourage a second attempt - perhaps, too, a safety noose?

(Do not suggest a soft landing padded with your yet to be laundered (burned) Stay-Fresh jobbies. He'd break every bone in his body).

Hanging is too good for him, a good kick up the arse is what's needed :big_tongue:

If you 'do let him go' Chief please make sure he leaves the keys to Fort Knox for his relief. He doles out the WD40 as if I might use it on a Strowger exchange and even accused me of using it, shall we say, intimately.

Fort Knox is my demesne, lock, stock and barrel. I will give the keys to my relief and any whippersnapper interfering will get the two smoking barrels.

Relief...RELIEF ???? and who says you are going anywhere young man? Squeek and Eric will miss your happy smiling face and I can't be arsed to train a replacement after all the effort I put into you :mad:

Get back to the tank top where you belong :yawn:

No one going for a run ashore? Heard about a bar not far from here that has entertainment. Residential band and stripper/dancers. They have draught Guinness as well the Pilot told me about it.

Mackeson substitute! Now we'll not get either of them back for days. I'll be stuck below with PipSqueek or whatever he calls himself just to keep the light on.

In the current climate are those going ashore obliged to wear face nappies?

Well, they'll probably be sh*t faced when they come back so seems appropriate.

Well said Mr V, and they've probably talked a fair bit of it as well.

The answer to my query is 'yes' then?
Too much bother for me, I'll pass, but doubt I'll be missed.

Malcolm you're one of the gang, on the team so to speak. All for one and one for all, get your glad rags on, a fetching medical mask in your pocket and be at the gangway in 10 minutes.
You shan't be missed because you'll be with us.

How kind, I don't suppose it has anything to do with the shiny credit card in my wallet..

A shiny credit card, why didn't you say so, we would have ordered a taxi. Tmax's legendary parsimoniousness enables him to smell un-maxed-out credit cards at a hundred paces. You are now his bestest friend.
Hey Mr Bartender we'll have a tray of Armagnac Cee Voos Plez.

Have a care. It's only polished because no one accepts them cobweb covered.

Well spotted Mr V, it is perhaps the result of it being slid out of my wallet rather too frequently.

Ah Ha I detect the aroma of a virgin credit card :curtain_call: Methinks the lad has a lot to learn polishing his Visa in such reprobate company, :cloud: I shall take this innocent abroad and instruct him in the way of getting on the good side of an injuneer.

Mine is a pint of Creme de Menthe and a double Black Bush chaser :pint:

Hey Ho, here we go.
I wonder whether the bank will accept that I 'lost' it somewhere while slightly inebriated.

btw - what happened to the word 'round'?

They'll believe everything but 'slightly'.

Probably once in your life you 'lost' it somewhere while slightly inebriated. This will now become a weekly occurrence as Varley has hollow legs; BB, FJ and BS don't require a crate of Mackeson's but have a liking for Black Bush. Being Aussie Casey Jones is a pleasure to take ashore as he will drink anything and the cheaper the better.

The word 'round' just ain't in our vocabulary, we leave that sort of behaviour to the Bank Line and Cunard-Brocklebank.

'... Being Aussie Casey Jones is a pleasure to take ashore as he will drink anything and the cheaper the better ...'

Is he the one who buys red wine at $5 bottle, drinks half a glass, puts it in the fridge, pours another half glass tomorrow and then blows it round to room temperature in the microwave ???????

If so I'll stick to Coke and Vegemite thank you. :jester:

If so I'll stick to Coke and Vegemite thank you.

You are in danger of setting a good example and could loose face if you don't take up a bad habit. Start smoking cigars or a pipe, chewing tobacco is acceptable but you mustn't dribble. A light ale could rehabilitate you.

I'll just get my red out of the microwave ............................. surely that will be bad enough.

Damn. Our secret is blown. Horns for radar scanners went out with weight and lever safety valves. That little contraption serves both to chambre by the glass and to obviate decanting (should you have accidentally acquired something fit for a starched-linen table) by centrifugal sediment removal (special goblet provided with a range of gravity discs available, Chateau Baron Philippe to Cockburn's Quinta Dos Canais - use short pulse only for Port).

It is with great sadness I note that ES has omitted me from the "going ashore drinks party" (7021)

I am at a loss to understand why I appear to be persona non gratia as we have been most cordial of late and in point of fact I have shown him nothing but kindness and consideration by rescheduling all the awkward and mucky jobs.

I know when I'm not wanted so I shall retire alone and friendless to my funnel suite with only Squeek and Eric as companions :very_sad::very_sad:

On wines - Wine pairing with food.
I came upon this little rule of thumb.. If the food has a French name, then French wine; Italian food then Italian wine etc
I am somewhat at a loss for the pairing with my Surströmming.
Any suggestions?

Oh Ye of Little Faith. Do we detect an ever so slight touch of inferiority complex?
Of course you're there just after FJ. Silly Boy.

As for this guy smelling like the hold of a fishing smack, he can go ashore with Sequeek and Albert.

Gammel Dansk? Gammel Dansk and gin? Gammel Dansk and MGT4?

(Should you persuade the old man to put some in the bond would you mind keeping and eating it in the paint locker. Along with that herring flavoured tinned hydrogen sulphide. That way we won't have to turn the dining saloon into an hazardous area).

Can we putchase BA Sets with a feeding tube? I foresee many uses for same.

I haven't even opened the tin yet!

My next question was going to be; Where can I open it? But I suppose the paint locker it has to be. I had in mind waiting till we got underway and standing right aft..
Next, Does anyone else want any? Once you get past the gagging it really is fine.

Having given it some consideration, perhaps wine is not the ideal pairing. Avtur flavoured schnapps maybe.

F44 as we say in NATO.

That's the stuff :thumb:
One gets a certain taste for the exhaust residue on summer afternoons.
I go out into the garden, put my nose to the air, if I can hear it then it is a jet engine from Hurn; If I cannot hear it then it is a nearby barbecue.
Somehow they both smell, and taste, the same.

Ireland has many islands off the West coast, each has its own unique food, drink and flavourings all of which are abhorrent to the Christian palette.
We have one major island off the East coast which no longer comes under our jurisdiction but the real natives live happily under our influence. I have no doubt they have some pagan condiment or hooch which will complement your Surströmming, it will not be Scandi but there again Pytt i panna is not either. Gammal Dansk has a lot to recommend it once one accepts the mild Colgate taste.
Bon Appétit.

(Back on line after 5 days with no internet)

Good to be back aboard, Great night ashore, still cant figure out how that wine bottle disappeared. maybe she had a Dwarf chappie hiding under that skirt and he just grabbed it.

Merci E-S, but I think you have the wrong Island in your sights.

The one you must mean does have native liqueurs of different flavours. It is veritable scarred with the the evidence of your countrymen's influence, unlike this Island. Nevertheless they would have remained unknown apart from bagpipes, incompletely constructed and poorly played, had it not been for Smeaton, Brindley, Telford, the Brunels et al. Brains to guide more westerly braun.

We do have a home grown wheel, lades and a small stretch of dual carriageway. So if your lot did get here they didn't do very much (but I am sure Okells and now Bushy's would dearly like you try again, just leave the picks and shovels behind).

(I think hooch making was dropped when smuggles cognac became easier to broach. Only recently have we tried again - I understand IMO are researching it as low greenhouse fuel. I am not sure they can be right, if looks like MDO, smells like MDO and tastes like MDO ............ (C19 gave them a lifeline, marketed as hand sanitiser, it tasted no better).

ML - have the RAF taken to using recycled chip shop oil? Probably light off OK, especially with a drop of Gamel Dansk as 'Easy Start'.

Probably not a solution for the Fleet Air Arm - have to equip the RFA oilers with multiple 'fast food outlets'.

good old Diesels, anything thin enough to be Atomised then compressed will make them run.

speaking of run I have just been to the Heads, checked the bowl and it showed 8 spots to the square inch so it must have been a good run ashore yesterday.
No news from the agent yet so we will be here fo a couple of days then we must move somewhere else as this berth will be required for another vessel.

With you lot drinking ashore they'll not need us to shift. They only tell you that because they usually have to dredge the empties from any berth we're at for more than a day or two.

"ML - have the RAF taken to using recycled chip shop oil?"

Probably the other way around, I suspect that my neighbours are using jet fuel to light the barbecue.
Obviously I prefer the smell of napalm in the morning...