Shipping History

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-   -   virtual crazy gang, part II (https://www.shippinghistory.com/showthread.php?t=56)

Malcolm G 5th July 2021 18:43

I think that someone has been nosing around in my cabin.
It may be just a coincidence that TMac revealed his alternative energy source.
I was not going to tell anyone until I had a working model but it seems that ‘someone’ may have misinterpreted the sketches and plans on my drawing board.
Perhaps I should not have captioned it ‘An alternative means of Wind Power for ships’.
The idea is that we install high efficiency cylindrical form wind generators to make electricity.
That electricity would be used to produce hydrogen using electrolysis. I had thought about photoelectrolysis but that needs sunny weather and lots of it.
The hydrogen can be used as a storable fuel. I was sure that our engineering genius would work out how to power the engines with gas, and so it seems…

So Wind? Gas? Pipes ? Not quite the same definitions, just coincidental…

billyboy 9th July 2021 09:57

Yawn....boring swing round the hook waiting for work. what say we lower a boat and have a run ashore? we can get a taxi into town and have a look around. or we can rig the stainless pool bar and lounge around out here. I am open to all suggestions lads.

Engine Serang 9th July 2021 11:36

Second Engineer (me):- Well I'm going ashore for a decent meal.

Chief Cook:- I'm coming with you.

Varley 9th July 2021 11:37

I am not sure if H2 is safe with the approved safe type equipment fitted in view of both paint locker and the existing gastroflatoleum auxiliary fuel that Tmac and his socks generate under what passes for normal circumstances on this mighty V. Talking of socks isn't that another thing along with knocks that we have to stop doing?

They tell us we must stop eating beef as the cows fart holes in the Ausone layer (that is on the shelf below the Rochas) - I haven't so much as heard a bottle clink let alone found a bull in the sake store. When will they get around to the hazards of human flatus - will we be excluded from IMO special areas until we have been colo-explosiometered?

Engine Serang 12th July 2021 21:49

Just home after a long, exhausting but enjoyable day. Feet in a basin of Radox and hand around a tumbler of Black Bush. Just awaiting dinner (the heel of a loaf, irish butter and white pudding filling) and HP Sauce.
IOM must be very boring compared to Belfast.

billyboy 12th July 2021 22:02

IOM...Isle of Men. Tough as old boots. Those guys can cope with anything Including High speed Motorcycles. Strict border control means English, Irish and Scottish are closely checked. any sign of weakness and they get sent away back from whence they came.
Have to admire them really for the way they protect their Island Nation.

billyboy 13th July 2021 02:34

Ah yes the IOM (Isle of Men) Strict disciplinarians, tough and can cope with anything. The Manx border control turn away anyone not up to the grade.

Engine Serang 13th July 2021 08:03

Tough as Chocolate Blancmange. There's more fight in the North Irish Horse than there is in the entire Isle of Mona.
But they will fight like washerwomen to keep the right to facilitate dodgy people stash their ill gotten gains on the island.

Proud to be Manx.

Varley 13th July 2021 11:22

I think the wild Hibernian is conflating the fiscal thrust aimed at establishing a feline economy in his revolutionary state with that of this azure set jewel. 15% here (or it will be shortly), what of your 12.5%.

I take it the capitalisation indicates that you refer to HM's Yeomanry stationed somewhat to your North and not the nutritional, if not gourmet, native dish common on the tables around the Curragh (customarily taken of a Sunday and garnished with seasonal pomme du jour and unYorkshire batter pudding).

(Manx Pride! Dear Turing, did everyone pick that up?)

Engine Serang 13th July 2021 16:29

Dear Turing has me and Mr Google perplexed. Many Megabytes used up.

Varley 13th July 2021 17:18

Oh, for Watt's sake! I can only call on those gods who existed other than in the fairy tales of their shaman and that particular one probably suited the topic better than others. (I might have given Fulton an airing but he hailed from another enemy occupied part of HM's realm but Watt was into hot fog too just not as hot as you were used to).

Is the megabyte dimensionally qualified to become used up?

billyboy 20th July 2021 07:20

Just heard from the agent our job is cancelled due to Covid 19 variant.
so I think we will head off somewhere as I am bored swinging round the hook thingy.
Anyone got a nice port they would like to visit? we will get underway after lunch. Open to suggestions gentlemen!

Varley 20th July 2021 09:41

Port is to visit? I like your quaint turn of phrase I suppose the ladies have to withdraw when we make such visits?

Damn these viral Varmints! However I am happy here doing a bit of bronzie upwind of the sanitary fan exhaust (lovely weather, feasting on home grown broad beans and new potatoes, quite brown just not as brown as fumes from said exhaust - very bad for the aerial insulators).

Anyone taken ullages of the port and porter tanks? That would give us a pointer to when we must leave to get victualled.

Tmac1720 21st July 2021 17:11

Seeing as we are becalmed in Douglas bay, handy for Varley to make a run ashore, I have a suggestion which might make us a few sheckles. I've had Squeek and Eric toiling for months in the ER workshop, a misnomer if ever there was one, making genuine fake Titanic souvenirs. So far we have lumps of coal, bits of carpet, pieces of handrail and a BIG bag of rivets all stamped made in Norn Iron by H&W. What say we tiddle out on a booze cruise to the Titanic wreck site (to keep the GPS right in case anybody asks) linger for a few days and then return to shore with the goodies ready for sale to the mugs... sorry general public.

Just an idea like but we have bugger all else to do and winding ES up isn't fun anymore.

billyboy 21st July 2021 22:45

sounds good to me Tmac, By the way I dont suppose one of those rivets is a gold one by any chance!

Varley 22nd July 2021 01:55

I am not sure I dare post. We are commended to be more thinkful before we post but the bard's JC warned of the unclubbable nature of those that do this to excess. If you make it ashore by Saturday come for croquet and food cooked-inside-outside (Fortnums aren't delivering on excuse of Brexit so, thankfully, no ant droppings in aspic or sweet and sour twigs with which to commit the barbeque sin).

My opponents best player is 11. If he proves C19 positive he will have to isolate. The Calf is where I had in mind.

(The kind young people enticed me to join them in curry, out, this evening. Hobbled along to Terminus (last drink outbound Laxey) afterwards to find it closed, I suspect for lack of un-111'nd staff. Town dead, 300 cases with no identified source).

YM-Mundrabilla 22nd July 2021 05:24

Quote:

Originally Posted by Tmac1720 (Post 39532)
Seeing as we are becalmed in Douglas bay, handy for Varley to make a run ashore, I have a suggestion which might make us a few sheckles. I've had Squeek and Eric toiling for months in the ER workshop, a misnomer if ever there was one, making genuine fake Titanic souvenirs. So far we have lumps of coal, bits of carpet, pieces of handrail and a BIG bag of rivets all stamped made in Norn Iron by H&W. What say we tiddle out on a booze cruise to the Titanic wreck site (to keep the GPS right in case anybody asks) linger for a few days and then return to shore with the goodies ready for sale to the mugs... sorry general public.

Just an idea like but we have bugger all else to do and winding ES up isn't fun anymore.

Please do so Tmac but only on the condition that you (especially given your experience with young lady TV presenters) front on Antiques Roadshow with examples.
I am rather a fan of Fiona Bruce. :applause: At least I can understand her - she doesn't gabble like most female TV presenters here in Oz.
Is there a reason other than old age for my declining hearing?
Thankfully, I can still see OK. :jester:

Varley 22nd July 2021 10:35

Is there any hair on the palm of either hand?

I will have to see if the Astronomer Royal will favour me with another opinion - I don't think we need to swing the GPS for calibration. Simpler in the days of the hambone if true, then he would (and presumably still does as the Sun reaches the yard just as early as it always has) just use his big read lever at Greenwich to adjust Mother Earth's headlong rush so that she kept to time. I suppose NASA have there own big red lever to adjust the satellite constellation's orbitations so as to keep the proper time as told by his Lordship. Anyway doesn't one need to go round and round rather than out and back? (I dun DF stuff you kno).

billyboy 23rd July 2021 03:39

Hmmmmmm. Buttered toast with Vegemite and thinly sliced tomato for lunch methinks. (had 4 jars arrive from the UK)....(happy bunnie today)

YM-Mundrabilla 23rd July 2021 08:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by billyboy (Post 39552)
Hmmmmmm. Buttered toast with Vegemite and thinly sliced tomato for lunch methinks. (had 4 jars arrive from the UK)....(happy bunnie today)

Vegemite from the UK!!!!!!!!
Don't touch it. It has to be FAKE.
Probably a Chinese knock off although I know that ES has been furtively experimenting down here with an Irish version so that might also be a possibility. I believe that the base materials are clinker, bunker C and kerosene.

billyboy 26th July 2021 12:40

(fingers crossed, back on line after 48 hours leave. New Modem fitted and seems Ok. 200mbps)

YM, My Vegemite has travelled afar, from the fair land Kangeroos to the land football hooligans then back to the Philippines.
Had to sit quiet and have a good sniff of it before spreading on my home made toasted Bread well buttered and accompanied by thinly sliced tomato.

Varley 26th July 2021 12:46

I think that must have been Huamite - see what it did to his modem.

billyboy 28th July 2021 00:48

ah but so good for you (apart from the high salt content) Crammed full of virus fighting vitamin B's and oh so tasty.
Think I might even host a vegemite party in my suite later.

YM-Mundrabilla 28th July 2021 01:18

We have several gallon tins somewhere down here. I got them cheap in Port Augusta when we were last there.
Luckily some unnamed philistine was physically restrained from throwing them overboard in international waters where he thought that he could get away with it.
I knew that they would come in handy sooner or later.
Use by date is only a little bit over (1957).

Varley 28th July 2021 01:20

Are you sure we haven't taken on a water industry charter. Crammed full of fighting virus - sounds more like a Bovril boat (perhaps the far from inert gas stench is not all down to Tmac).

Tmac1720 28th July 2021 14:57

Quote:

Originally Posted by Varley (Post 39595)
(perhaps the far from inert gas stench is not all down to Tmac).

Hoi I do my bit for the environment, I save gas, I fart in a jar :)

Varley 29th July 2021 09:37

I wish you would use the lead flasks reserved for our nuclear fuel charters.

(My chemistry lessons suggest that one needs to make such capture underwater - have you been misusing the hospital bath?)

billyboy 31st July 2021 12:56

Still nothing from the agent. reckon we will have to give my bank account a bashing in order to get away from here.

So crew, where do you want to go to. first come first served.

Varley 31st July 2021 14:19

I hear the good Dr. Who is to cease practicing timetravel for the BBC. I quite fancy New Orleans of the early 70's I am sure the classier members of the smokeroom would offer her a warm welcome and the MSB has a spare breaker cubicle (how much juice do you think a Tardis takes?). We may even be able to get Auntie to fork out as a sort of Golden Farewell Cruise and save Sir W some of his hard-earned.

('His', hard earned by us).

billyboy 2nd August 2021 21:59

No other suggestions therefore "New Orleans" it shall be.
Cut outs, pull up the hook thingy, ring down standby,
Both Radars on, Ecdis on, Iron mike at the ready.
Steward! fresh coffee pot and a bottle to the bridge please.
Looking at the map thingy its Cape town for bunkers then swing across the Pond North westish.
at Half telegraph speed (we should be making 20 knots)....Hmmm around 8 days I reckon

Varley 3rd August 2021 00:44

But what year. We need Mrs Dr, Who if we do this by Einstein we will need to go a lot faster. Even then it would be we who would be younger than today but not as young as we need New Orleans to be.

(Also required. Is a Tardis AC or DC?)

Ah. Miss Bright? I think Tmac is expecting you.

billyboy 5th August 2021 11:16

IF she GOES down there it will be HER thats expecting...These H&W engineers are a bit sharp set you know.

Tmac1720 5th August 2021 12:12

Och she will be fine and quite safe, my equipment hasn't been serviced in years and the bore is rusted up through little use. The piston rod is completely shot, even the blanks don't fire these days.

Put another way there is snow on the roof because the boiler doesn't work anymore :yawn:

I shall decline the opportunity and retire gracefully. I leave the rumpy pumpy to the young and virile like ES, he quite enjoys that sort of thing. :big_tongue:

billyboy 6th August 2021 12:47

What? when have you ever done anything gracefully? well I know you were graceful shaking hands with that nice lady from Buck house.

billyboy 12th August 2021 00:06

Stand by for docking Cut outs. we are heading into Cape town for bunkers. give us all a chance to stretch our legs ashore

Varley 12th August 2021 00:51

Damn the man. The second time I've had to have the plasticos arrange me a longer bunk.

Anyway, shouldn't we be that far already? We seem to be going too slowly for an ETA NOLA 1972.

billyboy 12th August 2021 01:12

after this we skip across the pond and visit New Orleans (Mr Varleys old stamping ground) Migh be a woman with three kids and a pram waiting for him there...LOL

Varley 12th August 2021 11:13

You flatter me but that is not the sort of relativity to which I allude!.

But for anyone fitting that frame (both time and moral clearance) I am sure the place would have been much the same in 1970 - if we use the red lever we might might squeeze another year back out of the improbability drive (D Adams. Pat.Pend.). Alternatively we could simply go back at economic speed and see what the ravages of time have wrought. Just as long as we don't return while any offspring might be 'troublesome'. I understand that is usually between ball-drop and taking to bitter but my nepotic experience is that it continues easily into the early 40s.

billyboy 17th August 2021 01:01

Ok cut outs. Untie them mooring lines and get them in. we have Pond crossing to do.
Stand by main engines!. Bow thruster hard a port! she's coming round nicely. stop thruster. slow ahead both. keep her in the middle quarter master.
OK full ahead both, give them a double ring revs for 20 knots. and send down a case of Black bush.

Varley 17th August 2021 11:09

Have you noticed that the time taken to consume a case of that Chateau Bothiebathtub matches almost exactly the time it takes to 'pull a unit'? It may not be the control room telephone that is always 'off hook' during such maintenance but the Chief.


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