Just had these installed for our ladies cabins...

I think we have a serious problem developing with the stores cut out.... I asked for a deodorant as it is getting a bit rank in the injun room and he enquired "ball type"?..... I simply wanted one for the arm pits so why he was so interested in my testicles is rather disturbing. :huh:

I assume you require the Black Bush tap removed then Sire !!!!!! Typical owner, makes changes to the General Arrangement but does he tell the poor bloody injuneer..........? NO he feckin' didn't !!!!!:really_mad:

I have had a word with the cutouts about this, and in future they will make a physical check to prevent you having the embarrassment of speaking politely to anyone, Mr Knuckles.

Red-17 would prefer Dom Perignon, William. (I tried foisting off a bottle of Dom Ruinart but she made her views very clear.)

no worries Tmac. got one for the black bush in the control room. can be drawn very cold or warm as required. (no need for that unmentionable hard water stuff you dont like)

Plastic stewards No's 8 and 9 are drilled to fill the 5 gallon bottles with the beverage of your own choice. I have 20 year old Laphroaig in mine heh heh. no rocks require at such low temperature.

Yup! And then we charged them big bucks to tow it around to Chittagong, and sold it for breaking there. :jump:

Crossing the line Northbound NNW of the Soloman Islands tomorrow. All crrew need to pay particular attention to dress. Ladies with wrap around skirts should wrap them in the opposite direction to the way they were when we crossed Southbound. Gentlemen should dress in the opposite way to when they were Southbound -- Right dressers to the left and vice versa ( and I don't really care if that gives you a headache.) The purpose of this is to counteract the equatorial vortex so that Neptune doesn't get unduly upset with us disturbing him yet once again.Maybe we should also toss him a couple of those old firkins of Ind, Coope, and Allsopp we've had kicking around in order to placate him. :pint:

:applause::applause::applause::

Can the good ship "Hope and Pray" avoid India as all that noise from the Rubber Stamping can cause headaches.

well I'm easy. Happy to go wherever Tom or the agent send us. Speaking of which...high time he found us another job. Not had a decent charter for a while.

There is a guano charter coming up down South America way:jester:

See what happens after your 75th. birthday???? -- we are already on a charter, but we have been having so much fun, perhaps that has slipped past everyone's notice. We are actually delivering, via a circuitous route, some top secret something or other to Taiwan. (Notice to shipper --- It will get there eventually.) We did mention we would have a little fun with Un when we slip by. In the meantime, enjoy everything this fine vessel has to offer. (Not meaning to plagiarise Sir Williams offering, of course.) :angel:

Taiwan ...might treat myself to some new ties then. Oh no that would be tieland eh.

They might sell you one.

I don't fancy a guano contract, I joined the GD to escape from sh1t related episodes of life.

He has one he uses it to keep his trousers up :jester:

As an injuneer of the "old school" I make it a point to NEVER speak politely to anyone :( one has a reputation to uphold :bye:

(Mr Knuckles....:)) I like that, very good young man, a deckie type person with acumen, two words I never though I'd use in the same sentence :jester:

Scabby arse more like.

I bet you have a heart of gold though (probably purloined from the last chief injuneer).

Svmer is icumen in
Lhude sing cuccu
Groweþ sed
and bloweþ med
and springþ þe wde nu
Sing cuccu

So you can whistle that, and think of my acumen.

Flipping heck! ...and I thought my keyboard was bad. Farmer Johns is worse than mine...LOL

Symer is icumen in where you are maybe, but around where we are it seems to have lost it's way. British tourist asked me if we ever get summer around here, to which I replied "Yes -- I think that last year it was on a Tuesday." :brain:

My general level of communication seems to have stalled. I just sent Sir William the message I thought I had deleted, and deleted the text I had lovingly composed.

I blame the election, I find it hard to think straight when I have an election on my mind or (more commonly) at hand.

Just put a cross against Absent-handcart-hell and press send.

(Hope you are feeling better David)

I voted for the virtual crazy party...and we won!...were here.