Think I wil diversify a little. Large brandy with ice and a shot of Lovage in it please stewaed. Oh and keep a bottle of Dom on ice too. I think RED17 will be along soon.

One Methuselah of the very best champagne awaits the twist of a skilled hand. There is always one there, it's like an emergency service. At times of great trouble a Nabuchadnezzar is also available, but you need a note from a responsible person. Never had one yet.

I note nobody ever asks where injuneers have their ancestry or lineage :cloud: on second thoughts perhaps it's best not to enquire :cloud:

I have always taken it for granted that our marvellous engineers are descended from Thor, you know, Thor Thumbs. They all have the same traits showing.

Little Ratty down the engine room has just ratted on Red 17. He says, and I quote: "In her off-duty hours Red is associating with squaddies and matelots" He thought it his duty to bring it to our attention. For myself I think it will help her overcome her shyness but we cant have anyone using Aussie Army swear words in the Smokeroom.
Hey Farmer open the frigg1ng Nebuchadnezzar you whinging Pom.

I say, you frightful little oik, to offer you a Methuselah is more than you deserve. You are a tittletattle and a turncoat. To suggest I come from Pomerania is foolish.

Are you sure ES didn't mean Pommery? It's up there with Veuve Cliquot and Taittinger. I'm not fussed about the label, it's what pours out when the cork is extracted that counts.

Drinks are on ice and Sir William.

Well? I wasn't expecting that and certainly not from Ratty, especially knowing what I know about him! No, don't ask, my professionalism will not allow me to disclose secrets from the sick bay.

You will never hear Aussie Army swear words from me but obviously ES, you know a few? I just wanted to hear the Aussie accent and when I heard that there were a few soldiers in the Australian Army uniform in town I decided to have a drink with them. Lovely bunch of chaps, just out of Duntroon. Hardly 'squaddies'.

(Message to self, must send Ratty a reminder about his injections.):chuckle:

Any truth that you did a couple of maintainance jobs for Ma'am at buck house Tmac?

In loo of further information ????? :cloud:

We have cleared the Windward Passage (no remarks about the alimentary canal please, gentlemen!) and have set a course for Grenada. We will get "lost" when we are somewhat North East of our destination --- we can then double back a bit to throw any interested parties off our scent. In the meantime, please enoy all that the Caribbean has to offer. Come as you are party on the pool deck, everyone!! :pint:

Hmmmmm ...Malibu it id then, Bottle plese steward!

Cuba Libre? Si! Amigo. :pint:

yeah....I'll have some of that too please steward

In the same glass?

HIC!!...habsolutely.....Burrrrrrrrrrrp!

Cuba Libre?

Great idea. Just put mine in a bucket please steward!

McC

Dartskipper -- please run an Azimuth of the moon -- very important our compasses are absolutely accurate, or the deviation card opdated. (Not that there are any deviants aboard this fine vessel.) :D

Oh I dont know. some of the stewards seem a bit devious.

There's quite a few names on the Deviant Card, Tom. Who did you have in mind to add to the list?

All the compasses are fine, although some of the points needed sharpening.

Checked the bearing of the Moon, and there seemed to be a reflection on the fo'c'sle head. It might have been a Plastico mooning the bridge, on second thoughts.

Actually -- it was my head -- I'd gone up to the fo'c'sle to reflect on the job at hand -- and being tonsorially challenged, and with no hat, I inadvertently provided the reflection. If you noticed that I always wear a hat outside when it is raining heavily, it is not because I don't like getting wet, but rather because I can't stand the noise. :jump:

I think we had better look at the Ship's Articles again, Tom. I didn't think that we signed on for wet weather. I distinctly remember somebody saying "Fair winds and following seas."

Sigh! ... Afraid my head does that too Tom

The injunes and the electrickery generator thingamobobs will be off line for a few hours so you lot can use candles or the reflection of baldy heads for light in the meantime.... there are loads of fun things you can do in the dark anyhoo :chuckle:

Squeek has gone on strike because "somebody" referred to him as ratty which, although he is of that rodent genus fervently dislikes the term rat/ratty/rodent features. :(

As usual it falls to me to placate his wounded feelings however rest assured the miscreant will be found and suitably chastised....(you all saw what happened to Sir William's house and he only ignored saying good morning to Squeek !!!)

I am sure Squeek knows that we all respect his work and would never attempt to insult him. If it will amuse him, he may look at his reflection in my shiny bald head, then move on to Sir William's, Then Tom's. If that doesn't convince him that he is at a funfair, nothing will, it's blooming hilarious.

I don't think a Donkey Greaser or more correctly a Ratty Greaser should be allowed to hold the ship to ransom by shutting down the air-con in this climate. The Master at Arms, Mr mcCloggie must frog march, or more correctly, Rat March him to the brig until he comes to his senses.
For balance, and with my hand on my heart, I can say some of my best friends are rodents and only a few of them are transvestites.

The gyro in my cabin, stateroom, seems stuck at NWbyW, whatever that means. Could some of our baldies tell me where the hell we are?

Bermuda Triangle.

Just in case you are in any doubt guys......

Have increased security on my villa in sunny East Antrim. It was built by Polish brickies and will not survive a prolonged onslaught by Tmac's hordes of chipmonkey friends. I wish I was nicer to Squeek and the other guy. Bigmouth.
Memo: increase insurance on villa.

Where's the loo?? :king::king:

The Master at Arms, Mr mcCloggie must frog march, or more correctly, Rat March him to the brig until he comes to his senses.

While I understand that industrial unrest can cause inconvenience, anger and even fury we must not loose sight of the fact that persons may have some very valid grievances and simply throwing them into the brig may be actually cause some unforeseen consequences.

Additionally, it must be remembered that the GD does not operate on the same terms as a warship under the Articles of War and Queens Regulations where go-slows, strikes and the refusal to obey orders are automatically disciplinary offences.

So, prior to marching anyone off to the brig I shall attempt to find the root cause of this disturbance, calm down all parties involved and hopefully ensure that normal service is resumed as soon as possible.

McC

A man of level headed good sense, not to be goaded into a rash decision.
It will be interesting to see if your attitude changes when one of the beasties runs up the leg of your regulation bell-bottom trousers and sniffs around for nuts. Tee Hee and up he rises.

you are a braver man than me Gunga Din :chuckle:

I take it then you have no further need for your dangly bits, Squeek is most partial to a plump testicle :eek::eek: Teeth like feckin' razor blades :supercool:

in the car park beside the cooker :chuckle:

Power is back on however you will note the addition of a pay meter on the bulkhead of your cabin. Please note this equipment does NOT accept washers, rupees or other foreign coins, blanking pieces or casino chips. Any attempt to by pass the meter will result in the miscreant being left in complete darkness with the air con set at a minimum of -40c and no hot water or flushing toilet (a slop bucket may be found in the wardrobe) Chargeable rate is £5 (sterling) per hour, payable in advance.

The injuneering department don't really regret imposing this charge as the "Injuneers going ashore jolly fund" requires much additional funding. Thank you for your cooperation however any complaints must be lodged in writing and posted into the boiler uptake.

Please note that these restrictions were not part of my attempts to resolve the Injuneering Departments grievances or find a solution!

Can I invite the Chief Engineer to join me for some Bushmills Malt and Scapa and a private meeting where we can resolve these differences?

Having said that it would appear that the issues originate from his own department!

McC

Things may calm down once we are out of the Bermuda Triangle. It is well documented that strange stuff happens, and people's perceptions of reality lose focus. Once we are South of Haiti and Cuba (I managed to avoid using the words Windward Passage, oh damn, no I didn't!), you will find that life aboard the GDII returns to its normal chaotic disorganised routine.

Make mine a double Ronrico Gold and lime.

that bit with the maroon tiles used to be the loo.
The cur...cor cour.....wrinkly metal bit was borrowed (nicked) from H&W football club. (can still smell the Guinness on it). The large building in the background is where we are at the moment. When buildong complete should look like the secomd pic. and all will be flood free.....Wheeeeeeeeeeee

Wow! I thought we were in the Caribbean, but it seems more like we are firmly wedged between British Columbia and Alberta in Canada with everyone claiming theirs is bigger than the others'. (Whatever it is that is bigger!) Here in Canuckland we have threats of turning off, or at least slowing down the flow of oil and wine. (Farmer John; Maybe we could consided reducing the pipe from the Black Bush header tank to the injun room back to its original size?? Only as a start, of course.) :bye: