following on from the "Roids". I nicked a bunch of grapes from the galley.....think i will put them back now...LOL

Just keep an eye open for mushroom clouds.

An old one, but never so poetically described in my experience. Brings tears to my eyes.

Didn't know that you could still buy them, or do you have a hoard stashed away Tom? Just in case you need them Eh?

Be warned!
Grandma used to take some liver pills/stuff, in hot water I think.
Don't know what it was called but it killed her in the end. She was only 88.
Perhaps it was the hot water.

remember the Beechams pills sold n little paper twists? Used to buy like that in Dieppe, only they were not .Beechams pills but little explosives. so with a few of them and a rubber band to launch them we could, under the cover of darkness keep the night watchman on the next ship on his toes. Just dropping one on the deck would result in a bang heh heh heh

Not familiar with them, but in a former life, when at the church youth club dances, after they'd turned the lights down a bit, one of our number had a mixture wrapped up in paper which he would distribute around the dance floor. Expecially during a quick step, or a foxtrot, the shoes scraping over this unstable mixture would produce a stream of sparks and a crackling sound. I think it was a mixture of iodine and perhaps sodium sulphate. Could always catch the culprit by the iodine stains on the hands. :cloud:

I don't know whether you can still buy them either -- just remember the saying. If any body has them it will be Sir William. He has a supply of little blue pills, so he may have some of the Carter variety as well. :wave:

Water, hot, or cold is lethal as per the following MSDS sheet:

Ban Dihydrogen Monoxide!
The Invisible Killer
Dihydrogen monoxide is colorless, odorless, tasteless, and kills uncounted thousands of people every year. Most of these deaths are caused by accidental inhalation of DHMO, but the dangers of dihydrogen monoxide do not end there. Prolonged exposure to its solid form causes severe tissue damage. Symptoms of DHMO ingestion can include excessive sweating and urination, and possibly a bloated feeling, nausea, vomiting and body electrolyte imbalance. For those who have become dependent, DHMO withdrawal means certain death.

Dihydrogen monoxide:
• is also known as hydroxyl acid, and is the major component of acid rain.
• contributes to the "greenhouse effect."
• may cause severe burns.
• contributes to the erosion of our natural landscape.
• accelerates corrosion and rusting of many metals.
• may cause electrical failures and decreased effectiveness of automobile brakes.
• has been found in excised tumors of terminal cancer patients.
Contamination Is Reaching Epidemic Proportions!
Quantities of dihydrogen monoxide have been found in almost every stream, lake, and reservoir in America today. But the pollution is global, and the contaminant has even been found in Antarctic ice. DHMO has caused millions of dollars of property damage in the midwest, and recently California.
Despite the danger, dihydrogen monoxide is often used:
• as an industrial solvent and coolant.
• in nuclear power plants.
• in the production of styrofoam.
• as a fire retardant.
• in many forms of cruel animal research.
• in the distribution of pesticides. Even after washing, produce remains contaminated by this chemical.
• as an additive in certain "junk-foods" and other food products.
Companies dump waste DHMO into rivers and the ocean, and nothing can be done to stop them because this practice is still legal. The impact on wildlife is extreme, and we cannot afford to ignore it any longer!
The Horror Must Be Stopped!
The American government has refused to ban the production, distribution, or use of this damaging chemical due to its "importance to the economic health of this nation." In fact, the navy and other military organizations are conducting experiments with DHMO, and designing multi-billion dollar devices to control and utilize it during warfare situations. Hundreds of military research facilities receive tons of it through a highly sophisticated underground distribution network. Many store large quantities for later use.

I had a pharmacist get really ticked off at me once when I asked him for some and after looking at the sheet he hadn't caught on what it really was -- then I told him. :bad_mad:

The iodine stuff is stupidly easy to make though I won't reveal how. My mate at school blew his thumb off and a fair part of his right hand. I imagine the chemicals used are now not so easily available.

I think 80/80 ammonia came into the equation somewhere. Ammonium tri-iodide?

I would think the ammonia of that strength would be hard to come by but I did think iodine crystals might have disappeared due to the micks propensity for making things that go bang from anything handy. One could buy such things from the chemists when I was boy (and did, Bowman's being my supplier as Pa could park outside and wave to the dispenser that I was a safe pair of hands). I remember from home and school) that just taking the stopper out of the ammonia and conc. HCl produced a white smoke of ammonium chloride.

The coincidence today is that I gave away the lot to the youngish son of a friend of ours. He is now a successful manager in a large financial institution and he introduced himself to me last night at a post TT fireworks booze up. The first time we have met since then, some 40 odd years ago.

Ref post 3089.

Without any of that lethal Dihydrogen Monoxide stuff, we wouldn't need any ships. Imagine having to drive the GDII everywhere. There would almost certainly be a parking warden official somewhere who would say,

"Yew carn't park that thing 'ere, I don't care what yer name is."

It's Nitrogen Triiodide, it will just go bang when it dries out. The lack of any level of stability is amazing. Ask my mate.

The Golden Dreamer would float on anything, even our dreams. Parking attendants would be so bemused by the splendour of the vessel they would avert their eyes and fall to their knees in obeisance. We would be paid a premium for attracting trade to a town.

Except when we didn't want to, when we wouldn't.

lot of talk about things that go bang ... spare a thought for our Chief Injunier....His Suck, Squeeze, Bang, Blow machines down below are banging away as we speak. (or are we parked somewhere?)

I'm not an injkuneer, but, Sir William, surely we don't have gasoline powered engines down below, other than for your turbo charged launch on the marina deck.

I always thought diesels were Suck, Squeeze, (Squirt),Bang, Blow ??

Although, due to the quiet smoothness of Tmacs injuns, I suspect they are steam turbines with super-heated steam provided by a nuclear reactor. :supercool:

Mr. McCloggie and Dartskipper -- please liase for our normal silent departure from New Orleans and lay a course for Tampa Bay. :huh:

O do in fact know (as an Honorary ember of ther golden spanner institute) exactly how it all works down there. But, I am sworn to secrecy. Suffice it to say its all very technical stuff.
Best we not mention it but keep the black bush flowing.

Speaking as a "Mick, as you so delicately put it, (with all the diplomacy Mr Trump lacks) , I am quite unaware of the need for iodine in an IED.
Mr V please educate us.

DS - can we meet in the bar please and discuss our silent departure?

I can ensure that the cut-outs remain quiet but we need to organise and understand signals for them. Flares, roman candles and general shouting of orders are presumably not appropriate!

I would suggest we utilise one or two cut-outs on the dockside to slip us and then the use of cranes and personnel basket to pick them up.

I they are not too afraid we should be able to perform the "slipex" in silence>

McC

The injuns on the GD are a closely guarded secret which is why the injun room is off limits to anyone other than those initiated into the brotherhood of the spanner or any nubile ladies young or slightly shop soiled ones (at my age and time of life I cannot afford to be choosy :big_tongue:)

ES ignore David and his derogatory reference to "micks".... yes I know it is a hurtful and unwarranted slur ill deserved of a noble people but a few idiots did cause our nation much shame and embarrassment. :very_sad:

On a medical note my sainted Mother swore by Mrs Cullen's Powders, as in "these feckin things don't feckin work" :balloon:

'night all, Squeek and I shall ensure you have a restful and fully air conditioned sleep in your quarters no matter what nefarious activity you get up to :wink:

I concur with your suggestion Mr McC, but we could single up moorings, and run long lines around the bollards ashore, bringing the eyes back on board, so that we won't have to run the risk of noisy cranes and personnel baskets banging the side as we recover the cut outs.

A pint of Oranjeboom steward please, just for the thirst. We can start on the harder stuff later.

Nefarious you say Tmac ... sounds like a challenge that.
Right. theres 3 ships moored ahead of us and three astern. .... Cut outs, hop ashore and cast off every mooring line you can see,
We will depart on our electric engines and fire the ********* ones up as we cross the bar. our wash shoul move the other ships about a bit. Harbour master will be so busy in the morning sorting that lot out he wont notice we have departed (without paying Dues) till we are well away heh heh heh

Compliments will get you everywhere ES but I will draw a veil of forgetfulness over my youthfull adventures with home made fireworks. Suffice it to say I am lucky to still have both my fingers and all three legs. Weedkiller and sugar worked well (with filter papers soaked in various metal salts as wadding one could make a re-useable, passably good, roman candle) but I never made workable gunpowder (nor did Uncle Bruv who tried to do so one Christmas with late Cousin's first Chemistry set).

Dear me, I didn't mean to offend. Should I have used Paddy? I am aware of certain pharmacological practices from enemy occupied Hibernia from an Irish Lady in whose company I quite often take a glass or two. They usually end up with the employment of some liquid remedy produced either evaporatively in a bothy or from one's own bladder.

(If you wonder why there are not many Plymouth Brethren in your neck of the woods it may be because her one recorded success was the cure of a young one of that tribe who she dosed with a full jug of poteen. She was quite well again when she woke up but the flu would only have lasted those three or four days anyway).

I concur with your suggestion Mr McC, but we could single up moorings, and run long lines around the bollards ashore, bringing the eyes back on board, so that we won't have to run the risk of noisy cranes and personnel baskets banging the side as we recover the cut outs.

A pint of Oranjeboom steward please, just for the thirst. We can start on the harder stuff later.


One would hope that the personnel baskets (or indeed Frogs) would not be banging off the sides of the ship - but I take your point!


I presume that Sir Williams idea of a quick escape involves the thrusters to go sidey-ways without resorting to springs. So be it.


To serious matters - as for Oranjeboom no thank you! It is the worst headache beer in the world. A pint of Hertog Jan for me please if we are on Eurofiz - if not a nice pint of Tger please!

McC

OK steward, belay that order for Oranjeboom, make it Amstel instead. Ice cold, if you please.

Tmac and his loyal band of oily persons is having a Sipex on the bottom plates but are smart enough to avoid the Oranjieboom. We would rather distill the essence of sweaty sox and jox and drink it, in fact guys off with your skiddies.
Lord T says Tampa is a cut above the noisy sweaty Orlean Nua and one in which the Black Gang will be comfortable.

What are these "Thrusters" of which you speak? Some kind of giant oar, manned to correct errors caused by faulty tugging (if that is the term I need)?

I'll have just poured a pint of "Crafty Old Hen", a tasty beer rather than the pissy lagery stuff many consume.

A schooner of Old Speckled Squeek can be refreshing in the tropics but is far too effervescent for the Edwardian genteelness of spivvy occupied Mona. Our electrictkial sideways thingy is not an big whore but in fact a Boegschroef. If you are insistent on a big whore just check the third cabin on the Orlop Deck.

Oh! Come on, you guys -- what's with this ice cold stuff --- How about a nice bottle of Guiness, off the shelf, poured into a pint glass containing 3 oz. of Paarl Port. We used to call that concoction "Niggers Blood" but now, of course totally politically incorrect. :pint:

schphecled ch hickens Hic! Sh kooners, We him der bumbuda twangle....Hic!

I am not sure there is enough electrickery laid on for a forced draft job fed from the Orlop DB. Is that cabin port of starboard? I'll wander down and check if you like.

Yep, I know what you mean, Sir.

Steward! Another round please.

About 7.30 by my watch, Sir William. If you wish to have a nap, I will wake you to dress for dinner.

I know what you mean about twangle.

Wasn't that a model made by Renault a few years ago?

I would have bought one. The triangular steering wheel and the plasticine suspension would have dragged me in.

I never knew Sir William came from the Netherlands!

McC

Actually, I think it was the Never Lands. Everything was purchased on the "Never Never Plan" ---- Think of it as the Charge of the Golden Dreamer Brigade! :quill:

Mr. McCloggie -- Would you please arrange for some cutouts to add some "wings" to the top of the funnel and paint it in Carnival colours. I've convinced their head office that their ship the Carnival Dreamer is docking at their terminal in St. Pete's tomorrow morning. (Just in case Tmac objects to any disturbance of his funnel suite, please place a peace offering of a 40 gallon drum of Black Bush beside his tinted double sliding glass doors.)

Think I'll turn in with a bottle of Four Bells. :yawn:

Tom after such a magnanimous gesture my funnel suite is at your disposal when required. Please give at least 1 hours notice prior to occupancy in order that the rat shit, empty bottles and other sunder detritus may be removed. :flowers: