I thought they were admiring our boot top paint job.

F stands for 'face' as in 'Why The Face' of course but as this does not seem to fit the context of FFS somehow I have no real idea. Sorry.
Nice dog by the way. Is he/she likely to bite me should I be encountered wandering the GD in the middle of the night?

No, no, he is an Australian Terrier and would recognise you as being a fellow Aussie. You are perfectly safe YM.

Thanks Red. I am greatly reassured.
I am just being hounded by our 15 year old Dachshund/Terrier cross called 'Tigger' as I have a Smacko in my pocket to give her at bed time.
I will bring one for your dog when next on deck.:jester:

Just been sent over from the Company Office - they're bluddy mean with the expenses, aren't they!

Goats...no....Sheep...its Sheep Coastie likes Tom. (I'll message him on Facebook.)

Red, there are two states possible when growing things.
1. Gardens
2. Goats

The two cannot exist at the same time. State 2 is a debased result of state 1.

A vital task, rigorous testing enables us to maintain our very high standards.

Thank you Farmer John. I will therefore continue with my efforts. Purely for research of course.

Steward!. I just sampled this case of old vintage Port. Please take the remaining 11 bottles to Mr Varley with my comploments, Oh and a box of his favorite cigars too. theres a good chap

Speaking of cigars, I suppose we should visit Havana next so we can replenish our stock. :hippy:

I like the thigh rolled ones please Tom.

"Then again as owner", well I'm flabbergasted, knockscombusherated and frankly amazed. Me and Tmac thought GD2 was a co-op where we all had equal shares after 100 thoughtful posts. Show us the Bill of Sale or Mortgage or be aware that mutiny is bubbling just under the Lazarette Deck.


It is rumoured that you have not been down the engine room in 20 years so less of your oul guff and show us the rent book, Captain.

Co-op? I must be owed an awful lot of dividends then. Not, in view of the port and smokes, that I'll be making a song and dance about it.

Oi, the necks been taken out of this one already!

Only one owner, the rest of you are highly paid (millionaires) by me. I have done my share on the bridge and Engine room in the past. Its just that I prefer to go on as a bar checker so you lot get good drinks. HIC!

As the "Ad" says, "One careful owner".

Only used on Sundays.

Perhaps we could recruit a technician to maintain our stocks in the very best condition.

nice thought FJ. I could watch her do that for hours.

He spent his youth watching tarts rolling woodbines in their sweaty thighs. A Gran Habano holds no excitement for our shipmate.

I can attest that Sir William was the owner of the GD1 on you know what site, and has always been the owner of the GD11. If you persons down in the pit can't keep up with what is going on in the rest of the world then I think we should (us up top) publish a daily newletter so that you better understand. Get your heads out of whatever crankcase where they are currently inserted and pay attention to the history of our fine vessel prior to your joining. . As an added note there will be no pictures in said publication including the comic section. I can also confirm, to all and sundried, that I have been personal witness to his many hours relieving Tmac and others by employing his injuneering background to keep all systems in perfect running order. SO THERE!!! :CLOUD:

Well that's me put in my box.

Nobody asked me and I've been here since Moses was no'but a lad :huh: no point is issuing me with a Newsletter, I only read injuneering manuals or magazines wot has pictures in :big_tongue: I study anatomy because in previous days I always wanted to be a Gynaecologist but couldn't quite get my hand in :wink:

Hang on while I think about that Tmac......??? now what would a Gynaecologist be looking at???
Hmmmmm, It appears that you are qualified to continue as you are..... LOL

Spoil sport! I only want the goats to do away with the artichokes then they can go back to their own area of the farm.

Found some old bottles with no labels down in the store. Think it might be fun to have a pot luck session in the lounge FJ.

Don't drink it BB, it could be drinkable and we could sell it to the natives.

Sir William, once I found that Gin came in green bottles I lost my sense of what was good to drink and what was not. A little experimentation would be fine, pot luck should mean decant it into a pint mug, rub some on your tongue if you can't identify it by look and smell. If it passes all these precautions, fight the rest off and neck it.

You first.

Red, it's goats or garden, I would go for garden. A sheep is a gentle beast that does not smell like, well, a Billygoat.

yeauchhhh! dont touch this green bottle...tastes like Diesel.

Now this is clear glass, dark golden brown colour looks like it might be as drop of Nelsons blood mate/
Wow...have a go at this then Tom. best demerara Rum I ever taste mate

Ah! Ha! Some alchemist has found a way to make Pussers 100 proof even better. :pint:

Steward! Nip down No 4 hold and see if you can fins some more bottles the same as this oneThink we got the makings of a good evening here Tom.

I can assure you it isn't Diesel :big_tongue: BUT it has been filtered through Squeek :wink:

Try lighting it anyway. Dr. Diesel advised that his engines would burn anything, even old shoes if introduced into the combustion chamber in small enough pieces.

Not that we want to bandy that about or a charterer or two will be bunkering us from Dr. Scholes.

Is anyone else feeling it's a bit stuffy in the smokeroom, I hope this lot will stand their round and not expect us go on deck for a smoke. Has anyone though of bringing across the figurehead of GD1 before some gallery fanatic sells it off to pay for photographs.

Steward! nip down there again and see if you can find bottles with red liquid in them. Mr Varley is quite partial to a drop of red. providing it is of a good vintage.

Good idea, Varley. Vaguely recollect it was similar to that of the "Cutty Sark" --- a scantily clad maiden with long flowing golden hair blowing in the wind. --- I think the model was a Diana Dors look-alike. :big_tongue:

Although some of you seem to think we are in Havana, that pleasure is reserved for 2 days after we leave St. Pete's tomorrow. Leaving port party on the pool deck in 10 minutes. :pint:

There's a lot of refugees and asylum seekers out there trying to escape a similar website.(Note: no criticism). Many are our friends and shipmates and should be allowed on board but some are of a serious and erudite disposition, like Varley, and should be repelled. I suggest a "Vetting Committee" be set up to admit on an individual basis, eg Tmac needs a 3/E and Red 17 wants a Tiger. BTW was Redser an asylum seeker and did she arrive in a Prison Van just like Top Gear? I think we should be told.

I thought that we were in Tampa? Where the devil is St Pete's? See you at the pool party, sorry, leaving port party on the pool deck. Whew, thank heavens I got that right, might have looked a bit off arriving in my red bikini.:shock:

Leaving Port? Are you mad? That stuff is £3.49 a bottle and comes with a plastic lemon! No, my friends, pass it to me, I can use it to clean the bath (the lemon, not the Port).

Port does not go well with Creme de Menthe. Make a note of that, someone, I can't see right now.