Mr. McCloggie; will you organise a press gang to get all our crew members quickly, and very quietly back aboard -- should leave in the dead of night to evade all those comely wenches looking to take advantage of our generous natures. :supercool:

Keep an eye on the lower ferry on the way out Tom. That guy with the MFV can really handle it and is quick to cross.

Could we leave at a slightly different time and meet some of them?

I can see this is going to be difficult!

OK - Shore Patrol mustered and proceeding ashore to check pubs, clubs, tea rooms, church hall discos, private yachts, Naval Colleges and secluded parks etc.

McC

I'm just a bit confused, are we looking for missing crew or comely wenches? Best to get that settled, we could end up rounding up all the comely sailors in port by mistake.

Any port in a storm F J. comely sailors'll have to do if there's missing wenches.

Ahhh many a happy hour or three I've spent stripping down a comely winch....

Oh sorry did you say wrench....? Yes indeed I've grappled with thousands of those over the years as well.

what?...speak up man !!! :( don't you know all injuneers are deaf especially when financial donations are required.... you think we wear muffs on our ears just to keep them warm...?:chuckle:

Don't try rounding up the Old Salt sitting in the corner of the back room in the Scarlet Geranium. Local legend has it that he's a ghost. :eek:

It might be a good idea if you accompanied Mr. McCloggie in his venture so you can check out those that may be desirable to be offered a position on the vessel, such as stewardess, wine waitress, spa masseuse, etc. Beware however of any wearing leather boots and carrying whips.

It may be that we will have to stay an extra day, in which case we will have to prevail on Tmac to allow us to push the purple button for our ocean transit, which is the level between the yellow and red buttons. The fact that we have managed to locate some rare vintage overproof Black Bush for his consideration might help !! :supercool:

SSR - perhaps you could persuade the U.S. women's hockey team to come to the #1 hold for an exhibition match with the Roedean girls team?? (Congratulations to them on their Olympic Gold tonight -- well perhaps yesterday for most of you. ) :king:

Muffs eh Tmac...Know a bit abiut those as well

Oh Goodie, another day with Nemo Atsi. :kiss:

Apparently you can get a cream for that, available at all good pharmacies and some crap ones as well :supercool:

I do feel a yearning to be rocked on the bosom of the deep. Failing that, a bottle of cheap whisky and two heavy duty balloons will do me. We will sail soon, Red-17, make your farewells, absence makes the heart grow fonder.

Here we go then -- 03:00 and all crew aboard. Engines are always on standby according to his Royal Emminence the Chieftain of the Up-and Down, In-and -Out, Round and Round department. Mr. McCloggie, let go the stern tie, then as we swing to the tide, let go the for'd buoy. Tmac, all ahead dead slow. Now, as we approach that MFV in the middle of the channel Farmer John give him a long loud PHRRRMMMMMMMMM on the whistle. That should get his attention. Then a shot of full ahead to engage him in some Rock 'n Roll. He! He! He! When we aqre out in the Channel, it's the purple button as we head for the "Big Apple".


Departure party -- Full English in the Pax lounge with Tequila Sunrise beverage. :pint:

I just had a look at your Map thingy Tom. we are headed towards a Submarine exercise area.
Possibilities for a wee bit of fun there methinks.

And keep well to seaward heading for Start Point, we don't want to fall foul of the Skerries Bank.

Once we clear Start, "Hammer Down."

(That is, put that hammer down Squeek and open up the throttle control!)

All clear Aft. Slipped from the mooring buoy Fwd.

All crew back on board plus some extras to help out in the Sauna etc.

My team has however reported that we also seem to have an extra Vice Admiral on-board somewhere but he does not show up on the PAX list.

Is he with us officially to assist getting through the submarine exercise area or (to put it nicely) is he a "private guest" of somebody?

McC

If the mysterious supernumary outstays his welcome, we can always drop him off as we pass Devonport. That is, unless he has been seconded to undertaking vitally important "domestic duties."

Me daydreaming:> Vice admirals a rather portly type, Large of tummy! RED17's rather slim and petite lady ???suppose there must be a way

Eh?...Eight Bells already? good lord!..." UP SPIRITS LADS"

Oh! Yes!! Our speciality --- with our refined hull form, non cavitational props, sound dampening devices, sonar cloaking device, etc., non of them will ever know that we are there until ----- we pour malt vinegar and half a pound of salt down the Brit sub's snorkel -- for the fish and chips. Oil the hinges on the Polish subs screen door so they won't know whether it's open or shut. Tie a red ribbon around the Russian's conning tower. Send two cartons of Fortune cookies down the Chinese sub's escape hatch. And, last, but not least, paste a picture of President Trump over the U.S. periscope so they won't know where the heck they're going. :supercool::supercool:

we could drop a grenade or three at speed and the heave too and see what nationality's pop up to the surface heh heh

Or just fire up our 8000 watt under water digital surroud sound THX speaker system with just one loud BANG - to let them know we are there, even though they don't know we are there. :king:

wow I could fel the shockwave of that Tom.

??load of bubbles off our starboard quarter someone's surfacing...Oh and another abeam of us.
be interesting to see who's been sat silently on the bottom spying eh.

Looks like they will be having a confrontation. Maybe best we make ourselves scarce eh!

Interesting!..first up the Russian. then the Jap came up followed by the Dutch. last up the Andrew (to see what the commotions is all about heh heh

All been sitting on the bottom trying to listen for each other no doubt.

To the Big Apple Tom, Full ahead both.