And here's the real thing

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GPq3qtDgITg

That was so good I wanted to march with them.

Never have a G&T with any hint of a Murray mint in one's mouth. Turns it from nectar to mortuary drippings (or what one could imagine as the taste of such drippings).

Well that's got our attention.

Has a way with words, does our Mr V.

Definitely spoiled my memories of a dripping sandwich for breakfast on a Monday morning ... :eek:

I went in this cafe today and saw two waitresses knocking lumps out of one another.

I asked the boss what it was all about & he explained that it was long-term disagreement about how long to leave a teabag in the pot!

He said, “It’s been brewing for ages.”

Try it for yourselves (the G&T that is not corpse pressings).

Watch Out For Your Eyes
 

You can't help but think but harbour the thought it might almost be worth losing an eye for .....:sweat:

Go for it Bob, remember the old saying I dont care if I do Die, do Die,Eye.

The image that launched a thousand Cadillacs.

♫ DA DOO RON RON RON
DA DOO RON RON ♪

:supercool::eek::cool:

Got a belly laugh from this ... even though it's completely daft !!! :sweat:

Two shrinks pass each other in the street:

• 'You're OK'
• 'How am I?'

(It's OK I am logging off now) :huh:

Horseman, whither goest thou?

https://www.facebook.com/1492832337/...77923646470207

Nowt wrong with that.
He got his to reverse when everyone else could only stand still.

Possible issues that he was going down-diddly-down when he should have been going up-diddly-up, and vice-versa, still, that`s why God gave you three testicles, so you could have a bit of a practice.

My mates’s wife, on holiday on the Cumbrian coast was bitten by a radioactive owl. Oddly, she's now apparently making all his important decisions for him.

He said, “I think she's been given the power of a tawny.”

Mr Varley, off this parish, has led me to believe Tawny is a drink. Ron, say it ain't so.

Are you, by any chance, related to the Bicardi empire. I do hope so.

Bicardi? Sorry I'm not yet old enough to wear even a single cardi. Admit to wearing sweaters in the depth of winter but only if I'm not wearing an undervest.

My West Indian mate was really upset when his triangle broke and couldn't play in his reggae band,.

A few days later he said, “I’ve welded it back together now so every little ting, gonna be alright!”

Please stay North of your belly-button.

Bicardis don't keep one that warm. The heat comes from the Coke.

Would that be Welsh or Newcastle Coke.:jester:

Well said, U. John!