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We just used a page from the "Tele" (Belfast Telegraph for the non locals) great fun trying to avoid it catching fire in your hands.
On the GD boilers we are posh in the injun room, only use the Financial Times or the Beano. Our library consists of the Beano, Bunty and the Bare Arse monthly.
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Oul scabby knuckles 
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
Anything God didn't create was made by engineers.
I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots 
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