I
thought I had discovered the perfect remedy for the f*ckwits who dawdle down the isles and stand staring into vacant space right at the very shelf I need to get to. I obtained a canister powered air horn which I secreted up a long overcoat. Upon coming across one of the said individuals I let loose a mighty toot which I have to say did have the desired effect.
Sadly my solution didn't last long as various complaints were made to the customer services staff and which resulted in my being escorted from the premises by security personnel
I must confess the security guards did have a large grin on their faces and admitted that was the most fun they had enjoyed in quite some time.
P.S. my wife now refuses to go shopping with me and prefers I wait in the car until she returns so all things considered a win win for me after all.
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Oul scabby knuckles
If at first you don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried
Anything God didn't create was made by engineers.
I try so hard to make things idiot proof but they keep making better idiots