virtual crazy gang, part II

[billyboy]

No, Not guilty Mr Varley. No solderin down there. Just a hot glue gun and of course a little wood glue plus Gold paint.

[Engine Serang]

A soldering iron as a 21st birthday present, how terribly sad. Presents should be silly and frivolous, no one wants socks, underwear or as Lady Bracknell would exclaim, " A Soldering Iron".

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Last soldering I did about 100 years ago used inherited, from my great grandfather, 'dumb' (copper) irons heated with a blow lamp.
I loved the old blow lamp but it scared the hell out of the YMs and the kids.

[Varley]

The little 21st birthday box of miscellany from Brother and his then (Pa: Don't know why he married the bitch) wife included a torch, a book on elementary sea signalling and a Titanic era BOT Instruction poster for donning a cork lifejacket (that is different from a Cork lifejacket one supposes).

[Engine Serang]

Only the best Kapok in our LJ's. Same-Same HMS Ulysses.

[Varley]

I don't think I knew that. I read that it was employed in vinyl envelopes to keep the water out.

Ma was horrified that I preferred a school kapok pillow instead of the eiderdown she provided (less keen on the similarly filled mattresses though).

(Note mustachios of same vintage)

[Engine Serang]

I'm told on good authority that a 21st is now an 18th and could become a 15th. Something about voting and dying for your country. I sometimes wish I was 15 again.

[YM-Mundrabilla]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

I'm told on good authority that a 21st is now an 18th and could become a 15th. Something about voting and dying for your country. I sometimes wish I was 15 again.

If any of us were young again would you be more worried about your future or your lack of a future?

[Engine Serang]

If I was young again I wouldn't give a toss about the future. Here I am after 50 years of bloody hard work........ and loosing faith in our politicians, our Medics, our Religious and our System. I may apply to join the atheists or the agnostics, like some, but I don't know the difference.
As one of my Ukrainian Masters would say, "Life is sh1te".

[Varley]

Come on! Summer is barely out and your SAD jab has worn off already?

We agnostics are the club to join however I think it is the only club to which almost everyone belongs, paid up or not.

I presently give no credence to any 'System' except science despite no popular understanding (any understanding) of the first stirring in the primordial soup. That given all that follows is clear and requires no superstition. Therefore I am an atheist you say? Well I certainly am at the moment but, were I to be of sound and ebriate mind, and a heavenly/satanic/elephant-shaped/etc. representative appear before me I would probably tend towards the deity(ies) for which they were lobbying. I think that makes me a well cemented-in temporarily atheist agnostic.

I knew one old bat, visiting her in care until she almost made 102, who would have told a supercharged gold encrusted vision of the Archangel Gabriel that he should not perform conjuring tricks on old ladies and get himself a proper job.

On one occasion when our heroes were observing a world only be the glow of re lights from the alarm tableau Alan Sharpe , chief, put and arm round my shoulder (in an entirely amicable and almost acceptable fashion) with "Davie*, my boy, life is just a bowl of shi-ite".

(*. I know. Anathema, as is touching Mrs V's little boy, but one's chief is one's chief).

[Farmer John]

I have a strong agnostic leaning, with some thoughts. Best described by "I don't believe in God, but if I am wrong, I don't mean to be rude."

[billyboy]

Tempted to make comments on that one but, as its the wifes 64th Birthday today I promised her I wouldnt be a naughty today!

[YM-Mundrabilla]

How do you get away with promising only one day BB? There must be more to this somewhere.
Don't forget the

[billyboy]

Being busy but good. Making a wooden armchair for an old lady. with a lift up seat and a shelf for the bucket.

Might make some for the crew bar, save all the walking along the alley to the heads.

[Varley]

I spend all that time in the Trident with that damned comminuter pump and you want to butcher some valuable dunnage into a smoke-room thunder box. If I find any size of old lady laying so much as a perfumed fart where I am drinking she will find herself locked up with her seven pals and every bastard will know exactly that they are 'there' and there'll be nothing whatever being the matter. If she wonders about what the matter is perhaps she should have kept the matter in for longer or used the proper cludgy after breakfast like the rest of us.

As for us. We can just continue using the porthole like we always do. (Did you know SN has a cabin where one can go an show off their member to Members. Here all Members have to do is look out for members hanging out of a porthole, or a starboard hole when the other side full). If you can pin the right name on one before it is withdrawn its Member has to put a case behind the bar.

[Engine Serang]

What's the procedure for Honourable and Right Honourable Members? I think they may require an ermine muffler.

Its 17.30 and already dark outside. Are we near the Equator Billy Boy?

[Engine Serang]

It's a Bank Holiday in Eire today and I'm staying in the scratcher. Any probs or queries should be directed to Tmax, the lazy bugger needs a couple of days running about like a blue arsed fly. He's becoming far too comfortable as Chief Engineer, a bit like Vmin who ambles around with a cardboard Flukemeter, ambles between the galley and the bar, mostly.
Do Not Disturb.

[Varley]

I did ask that question E-S (you have banks?) but "Admin" have not so far elucidated the Membership requirements, especially as to their expectations as to what Lady Members are to put up for inspection. They have not even confirmed if there is to be a lounge steward.

(If you do have banks why does your allotment demand that Owners remit Mrs E-S and the little E-Ss in bars of carbolic and dhobi dust?)

[Engine Serang]

My allotment is well fed with NPK, which I would not need to buy if any of my shipmates lived locally.
The Memsahib or Missus as you quaintly call her, an IOM term of endearment one presumes (the island is far too close to Liverpool) , uses the red soap when washing my smalls in the local stream.
I know you have a Zanussi or Hotpoint but the Mark 1 Memsahib at the stream has years of experience in the laundry department, and zero emissions.

[billyboy]

Zero emissions? ..... Have you heard her when shes been eating curried beans?

[Engine Serang]

Billy, boy; have a look at #6566
We would be better served if you and FJ did a wee bit of navigation and spent less time blackguarding the Memsahib. Rigel, Capella, Sirius and Vega should be in for a bit of attention tonight, if our Epauletted and Certificated Ossifiers can assemble the sextant. If they can find the sextant. Tmax thinks a Sextant is a pub on the dock road in Cork.

[Varley]

There are no emissions when eating curried beans, sprouts, eggs or artichokes (Jerusalem).

But that first knee-bending slap of linen on the rocky river-side after such a luncheoning has been digested (or partially so, anyway) and you can hear the little ozones hurling themselves into the carbollicky foam without waiting for the sunscreen.

Give them a star finder, almanacks, operational ham-bone or even a GPS and the answers'll be the same "We are in the wheelhouse" or "Magnavox, I'll give you Magnavox. It's miles out".

[Tmac1720]

Originally Posted by Engine Serang

Billy, boy; Tmax thinks a Sextant is a pub on the dock road in Cork.

Oh no I don't, I spent many a happy hour there in Bougis Street, Singapore

Are you still in touch with your nubile young lady friend?... you know, the one with the ping pong balls and the pint glass

[Engine Serang]

Bugis Street, never heard of it.
Suggest you take your own advice; destroy all evidence .
Never heard of the place, and relieved when it was shut down.

[Engine Serang]

We at Shipping History would like to wish you a happy birthday today!

Many thanks. E-S.