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Humour the best of medicine

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  #451  
Old 5th March 2020, 07:03
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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I think that rabbit is a hare. Broke my bollix laughing.
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  #452  
Old 7th March 2020, 16:38
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Be careful with that saw....
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  #453  
Old 10th March 2020, 16:28
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There is something about the kilt....
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  #454  
Old 14th March 2020, 14:03
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This panic buying is getting out of hand .....
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  #455  
Old 14th March 2020, 16:55
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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Bob, humour in short supply at the moment. Keep up the good work. What is the panic for toilet rolls? Does Corvid-19 attack your bum?
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  #456  
Old 14th March 2020, 17:01
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It's a mystery ... but just in case there's something in it ... make sure the pooch is properly trained, or you could lose the family treasure ...
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  #457  
Old 15th March 2020, 12:44
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Mrs. Ravioli comes to visit her son Anthony for dinner.
He lives with a female roommate, Maria.
During the course of the meal, his mother couldn't help but notice how pretty Anthony's roommate is.
Over the course of the evening, while watching the two interact, she started to wonder if there was more between Anthony and his roommate than met the eye.
Reading his mom's thoughts, Anthony volunteered, "I know what you must be thinking, but I assure you, Maria and I are just roommates.''
About a week later, Maria came to Anthony saying, "Ever since your mother came to dinner, I've been unable to find the silver sugar bowl. You don't suppose she took it, do you?"
"Well, I doubt it, but I'll email her, just to be sure." So he sat down and wrote an email:
Dear Mama,
I'm not saying that you "did" take the sugar bowl from my house; I'm not saying that you "did not" take it. But the fact remains that it has been missing ever since you were here for dinner.
Your Loving Son,
Anthony

A few days later, Anthony received a response email from his Mama which read:
Dear son,
I'm not saying that you "do" sleep with Maria, and I'm not saying that you "do not" sleep with her. But the fact remains that if she was sleeping in her OWN bed, she would have found the sugar bowl by now.
Your Loving Mama

Moral:
Never Bulla Shita you Mama
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(Actually Ripley said it first.)
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  #458  
Old 19th March 2020, 02:11
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Hi team check out,' the ballad of dunny roll,' for a bit of a giggle.
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  #459  
Old 19th March 2020, 07:00
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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keep Anthony painting the Forecastle.
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  #460  
Old 21st March 2020, 17:50
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Wishful Thinking ?
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  #461  
Old 21st March 2020, 18:11
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Definitely, although Trump might go for it ... (dumb f***** that he is.)
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  #462  
Old 24th March 2020, 13:09
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A Playlist whilst stuck inside
1.Don't stand so close to me - The Police
2.Isolation - John Lennon
3.Closed for Business - Mansun
4.Living on my own -Freddie Mercury
5.Who wants to live forever - Queen
6.There's a kind of hush - Herman's Hermits.
7. Passing Strangers - Sarah Vaughn and Billy Eckstein
8.Alone Again naturally - Gilbert O'Sullivan.
9.We gotta get out of this place - The Animals.
10.I want to break free - Queen
11.Panic - The Smiths
12.Fever - Peggy Lee
13.It's the end of the world as we know it. - R.E.M.
14. Crazy - Patsy Cline
15.Don't Let it bring you down - Neil Young.
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  #463  
Old 24th March 2020, 14:58
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It's good news week?
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan
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  #464  
Old 24th March 2020, 16:22
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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American Idiot.
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  #465  
Old 24th March 2020, 16:27
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Ghost Town - The Specials
We will all go together when we go - Tom Lehrer
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  #466  
Old 24th March 2020, 21:01
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American Idiot - Green Day.
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  #467  
Old 24th March 2020, 23:01
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Tragedy. --Bee Gees
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  #468  
Old 24th March 2020, 23:10
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"Word Up" .... (although I'll admit, I'm being a bit dark and cynical.)
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"I say we take off, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."
Corporal Hicks
(Actually Ripley said it first.)
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  #469  
Old 25th March 2020, 08:35
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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There'll be Bluebirds over the White Cliffs of Dover - Vera Lynn

Who do you think you are kidding Mr Virus - Cast and Company of Dads Army.

Greatest Hits, Double Album - George Formby.
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  #470  
Old 25th March 2020, 11:44
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When I am laid in earth - Purcell
My word! You do look queer - Holloway
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan
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  #471  
Old 25th March 2020, 17:42
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My word! You do look queer - Holloway

Plus:

DILLIGAF - Kevin Bloody Wilson
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  #472  
Old 25th March 2020, 17:47
Dave McGouldrick Dave McGouldrick is online now
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My word! You do look queer - Holloway

Plus:

DILLIGAF - Kevin Bloody Wilson
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  #473  
Old 25th March 2020, 23:08
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There's a strong echo in here ....
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"I say we take off, nuke the site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure."
Corporal Hicks
(Actually Ripley said it first.)
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  #474  
Old 26th March 2020, 09:26
Dave McGouldrick Dave McGouldrick is online now
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I guess it must be the drink
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  #475  
Old 26th March 2020, 10:24
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Wouldn't that be reading double rather than writing double?
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan
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