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virtual crazy gang, part II

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  #5176  
Old 19th June 2019, 13:40
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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My sentiments exactly.
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  #5177  
Old 19th June 2019, 14:00
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Quote:
Originally Posted by YM-Mundrabilla View Post
Course change to ensure that we don't fall off the edge (of the chart, of course) or is it to lengthen our voyage with the nuns some of whose habits are actually quite delightful.
We have edged past the bloated belly of Brazil and are now delicately threading our way through sundry clusters of island.

ES, we should all wash out our mouths with soap and water, we are all smutty. I feel a deep sense of sin washing over me, it's great.
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  #5178  
Old 19th June 2019, 18:36
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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There are so many bloated bellies on this ship that you had no difficulty in recognising another on the coast of Bra-zil. You may have more difficulty recognising a lighthouse.
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  #5179  
Old 19th June 2019, 23:06
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ES, no, it will have a bloody great light somewhere near it.

Injuneers, unless it has a load of oil all over it they think it is imaginary.


And if it has they can't wait to take it to bits or eat it.
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  #5180  
Old 20th June 2019, 09:59
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You confuse 'well tempered constitution' with 'bloat'.
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  #5181  
Old 20th June 2019, 13:12
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Just learned the Nun with expensive glasses is a Mother superior. I found she was far superior to the sisters I had experienced earlier,
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  #5182  
Old 20th June 2019, 15:27
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is a Mother superior.
Deny everything, we aren't gentlemen and we can't afford that kind of malarkey.
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  #5183  
Old 21st June 2019, 17:39
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I think the conventional position to get to be a mother is the inferior (let us discount those few enthusiasts that favour standing in a hammock).
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
Himself. It struck him dead and serve him right
It is the duty of the wealthy man
To give employment to the artisan
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  #5184  
Old 21st June 2019, 18:01
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More than one position? Where will it all end.
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  #5185  
Old 21st June 2019, 22:01
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More than one position? Where will it all end.
On the deck?
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  #5186  
Old 22nd June 2019, 07:54
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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FJ, my advice to you is to do what TA would do in similar circumstances, namely head for the nearest convenient port and land these divisive holy wemen soonest.

The smell of their carbolic soap is turning some of your officers into Teddy Meldrums, and it is most unsettling for us elder lemons. And remember charterers don't like dispoiled cargo.
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  #5187  
Old 23rd June 2019, 17:17
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Two days to docking, the cargo has been entertaining and learned, we will all be better people for having mixed with these ladies of high moral standing and erudite knowledge.

One or two of the crew have been a little giggly because they were unused to mixing with female company.

I have been slightly alarmed at the amount of money I have lost to them at Poker, but that is my foolishness and they have agreed to take the money in yearly payments. This is now reflected in my will and passes as a liability to my descendants.

We will miss their unfailing cheerfulness, it can be rather wearing at times, but they have observed the ban on passengers on the bridge so those in the know have had a refuge from the constant hymn singing and the clash of rosary beads.

We can replenish our draw down on Rum from my special reserves, the cigars are not a great loss, they never got the very best, the spittoons will be removed when the passengers leave, they were at best aspirational.
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Last edited by Farmer John; 24th June 2019 at 09:27.
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  #5188  
Old 24th June 2019, 09:31
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I have ordered a "deep clean" once we have said goobye to our guests. The alleyways will require some painting after the football games.
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  #5189  
Old 24th June 2019, 19:47
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I have ordered a "deep clean" once we have said goobye to our guests. The alleyways will require some painting after the football games.
To say nothing of the engineers' flat after the Hurling and Shinty championships.
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  #5190  
Old 24th June 2019, 21:08
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Vigorous ladies. They don't all put the seat down, either.
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  #5191  
Old 26th June 2019, 15:54
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Well here we are, all moored up and awaiting new orders (and the return of Tom after his trip. Hope it is going well.

Deep clean gang have complained about the rude drawings on the wall, but most of the rest of it has come up well. Who would have thought nuns would have brought a portable welder to inscribe comments? Oh well, we live and learn.

Who's coming ashore for a couple of gallons of beer?
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  #5192  
Old 26th June 2019, 17:11
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Anyone been here before? You can't walk anywhere and the whole place is not "Have a Beer" friendly.

Back to the ship, Horse doofers will be laid on, the Tiki bar will be opened on the deck, drinks are on me.
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  #5193  
Old 26th June 2019, 18:07
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Who's coming ashore for a couple of gallons of beer?
Couple of gallons of beer ?? pah lightweight.... now make that a couple of gallons of Black Bush and now yer talkin' Thirsty work down in the pit y'know
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  #5194  
Old 27th June 2019, 22:52
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Miami is full of Democrats all debating. There are masses of them. Any one got a favoured destination? Mass debating holds no attractions to me.
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  #5195  
Old 27th June 2019, 23:01
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right who's for a run ashore in good old Miami. Nice hotel bar not far away from here. great stock of drinks too!.
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  #5196  
Old 28th June 2019, 06:27
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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I'm heading to Miami Beach, much more my scene and I'll start the evening with a big burger in The News Café, grub on-board very bland to suit Their Holinesses.

Intend spending the rest of the evening drinking CL's with some little Cuban lady and finishing up in a small, pastel coloured hotel. Happiness.

And youse loosers' can spend the evening squabbling about Dives on Brickell Avenue.

Last edited by Engine Serang; 28th June 2019 at 06:29. Reason: Bile.
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  #5197  
Old 29th June 2019, 05:44
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More than one position? Where will it all end.
Then there was the sex ed. class where the instructor informed the class that there were 27 positions in which to engage in sex. He started by saying that one is the "Missionary position" where the man lays directly on the top of the woman. A voice with a hint of amazement sounded from the back of the class "28" !!

Please be informed that I am indeed back from my road trip, graduation ceremony, etc., after putting about 2,500 miles on the motor home. Had a good time, and am glad that the crew of the GD have behaved themselves in the manner and decorum with which I would expect. I am pleased that you managed to blend with our passengers to the extent that you all got nun at some point in the voyage. When you've all had your relief run ashore, please join me on the pool deck for drinks on my tab!
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  #5198  
Old 29th June 2019, 09:24
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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Hip-Hip-Horray
Auld Misery Guts is back, bearing tales of a motorhome.
Donkeyman, where's my ear muffs.
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  #5199  
Old 29th June 2019, 09:41
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Don't call him 'misery guts' until we have seen how far that tab stretches.

(Ear muffs. Is it that cold down there?)
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Lord Finchley tried to mend the electric light
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  #5200  
Old 29th June 2019, 09:47
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Since ES has been consigned to the nethermost pit of Hell (which, as any fule kno, is frozen) he will be glad to use a muff.
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