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virtual crazy gang, part II

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  #3876  
Old 11th October 2018, 21:06
Engine Serang Northern Ireland Engine Serang is offline
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I would love an arrangement on here where, if you typed in ******, a random obscenity was substituted.


Howzabout:- "Dickie".
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  #3877  
Old 11th October 2018, 21:09
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That brown stuff we injected into the turbo-thingies is a bl00dy good chaser. A dash of Angostura Bitters sets it off lush.
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  #3878  
Old 11th October 2018, 21:19
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I would love an arrangement on here where, if you typed in ******, a random obscenity was substituted.
What, like, "Oh FFFFFxxxxxxxxxxxqqqqqqqqqq$$$$$$$$ZZZZZphrrrrrrrrr rtttttttt ?
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  #3879  
Old 12th October 2018, 07:37
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Arranging a going away concert on the beach at sunset. Large bonfire with surrounding Tiki lights. Tmac, please bring your Lambeg, and all other accomplished (or otherwise) musicians bring whatever it is that you can get sound from. (Conch shells, Kazoos, Spoons, squeeze boxes, tin whistles, or whatever. I do know there are some accomplished guitar players aboard, but the actual lyrics will have to pass the censorship board first. (Nice young children will be present.)

BBQ pulled pork with pineapple, and other traditional tropical delicacies in more than sufficient quantities for all to enjoy. Free bar set up for the locals to enjoy our hospitality to the fullest.
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  #3880  
Old 12th October 2018, 12:35
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Gonna be a great party Tom. well done. I look forward to it.
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  #3881  
Old 12th October 2018, 15:49
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Why are we leaving? Oh well, money to be made I suppose.

As a special surprise for occasions such as this I have been tutoring some of the Plaggy stewards in musical entertainment, so tonight, after their excellent work on the free bar, the BBQ and all other things we will have the Barstewards Band, a gentle little combo, a cross between Wee Willie Harris and Captain Beefheart and his Magic Band, with a smooth vocal reminiscent of Astrud Gilberto. This is to thank the people of San Blas and ensure we are welcome again.
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  #3882  
Old 12th October 2018, 17:03
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Is Wee Willie Harris a person or a condition? If the latter don't seat him at my table.
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  #3883  
Old 12th October 2018, 17:57
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You deserve no special treatment, so you probably won't get Wee Willie Harris.

It's the urine that helps with the thickening of the material, hence the sign in the urinals "This is where we get felt".
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  #3884  
Old 12th October 2018, 18:52
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Feck sake, I struggled to bring my big Lambeg Drum to the party only to find the bloody place in darkness and the bar closed

I went for the pulled pork but apparently some bugger called Cameron got there first

If anybody wants me I'll be in my funnel suite, sulking
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  #3885  
Old 12th October 2018, 18:54
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"This is where we get felt".
Reminds me of the time I was in a large drapery store in Old Belshaft (don't ask) and I asked the young lady "Can I get felt here?" she replied "well you can take your chance with the rest of us"
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  #3886  
Old 12th October 2018, 22:05
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Originally Posted by Tmac1720 View Post
Feck sake, I struggled to bring my big Lambeg Drum to the party only to find the bloody place in darkness and the bar closed

I went for the pulled pork but apparently some bugger called Cameron got there first

If anybody wants me I'll be in my funnel suite, sulking
C'mon out, Tmac, we were all waiting for you and dozed off. This is the place to be cheerfully relaxed, we need you to bang your big skin, the Barstewards Band has a backing for your elemental bashing.

We know you enjoy a sulk, but you also enjoy a hooley.
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  #3887  
Old 12th October 2018, 22:20
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Originally Posted by Tmac1720 View Post
Reminds me of the time I was in a large drapery store in Old Belshaft (don't ask) and I asked the young lady "Can I get felt here?" she replied "well you can take your chance with the rest of us"


That's why the Good Lord burnt down the Bank Buildings. A den of iniquity. Can I get felt, indeed.
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  #3888  
Old 13th October 2018, 06:09
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Originally Posted by Farmer John View Post
Why are we leaving? Oh well, money to be made I suppose.

As a special surprise for occasions such as this I have been tutoring some of the Plaggy stewards in musical entertainment, so tonight, after their excellent work on the free bar, the BBQ and all other things we will have the Barstewards Band, a gentle little combo, a cross between Wee Willie Harris and Captain Beefheart and his Magic Band, with a smooth vocal reminiscent of Astrud Gilberto. This is to thank the people of San Blas and ensure we are welcome again.
Just to make sure we can round off the evening on a high note, I have engaged Jock Strapp and his All Elastic Band to "pipe" us back aboard after the Beach do. Night caps on the pool deck on me.
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  #3889  
Old 13th October 2018, 07:31
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Mega sh1t Captain, Stan Getz is at the gangway looking for his Missus. Tmac and Herr Strapp have previous, expect fisticuffs and a lack of Queensbury. Me and Capt Morgan will be hiding in the Steering Flat.
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  #3890  
Old 13th October 2018, 09:10
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No worries mate. Tmac will soo lay him out with a swift shifter blow.
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  #3891  
Old 13th October 2018, 09:59
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T is beginning to sound like an hourly paid employee. Surely shome mistake.
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  #3892  
Old 13th October 2018, 18:11
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So, Tom, what are we doing next? I do have to stand watch and I find "carry on" is scarcely sufficient orders, and with the more skittish has been known to cause problems. I will be sorry to sail away from here, but does anyone fancy somewhere more straightforward? A trip to the famous twin jetties of Brest would be a change.
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  #3893  
Old 13th October 2018, 23:11
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pair of brests always welcome FJ
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  #3894  
Old 14th October 2018, 07:43
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As previously announced the plan is to traverse the American ditch and cruise the West Coast of South America at our leisure, and then work our way across the Pacific to the Antipodes (to us English blokes) and then do our Christmas annual dry docking, leave taking, etc. in Aus. (Please note that it is now working into summer in the Southern hemisphere, so staying in the warm. (Note to keep Tmac and ES happy so we have the refer units keeping the beer cold.)
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  #3895  
Old 14th October 2018, 21:52
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Originally Posted by Tom Alexander View Post
As previously announced the plan is to traverse the American ditch and cruise the West Coast of South America at our leisure, and then work our way across the Pacific to the Antipodes (to us English blokes) and then do our Christmas annual dry docking, leave taking, etc. in Aus. (Please note that it is now working into summer in the Southern hemisphere, so staying in the warm. (Note to keep Tmac and ES happy so we have the refer units keeping the beer cold.)
Are we nearly there yet?
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  #3896  
Old 14th October 2018, 23:41
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Relax FJ, ECDIS will take us there. See if you can find an excuse for a crew party mate.
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  #3897  
Old 15th October 2018, 06:28
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Relax FJ, ECDIS will take us there. See if you can find an excuse for a crew party mate.
You found your belly button lint remover? (She looks remarkably like that young maiden that was sitting on your lap over on the beach. )
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  #3898  
Old 15th October 2018, 06:31
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Mr. McCloggie -- we will raise the anchor in 4 hours. Heading for the Panama Canal. (Departure time gives us sufficient time for a sobering second draught. )
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  #3899  
Old 15th October 2018, 23:07
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sobering second draught!!! excellent idea Tom. I just happen to have a bottle of very old Pussers at hand that should do the trick.
Cheers Skipper!!
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  #3900  
Old 16th October 2018, 05:57
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sobering second draught!!! excellent idea Tom. I just happen to have a bottle of very old Pussers at hand that should do the trick.
Cheers Skipper!!
An excellent idea, Sir William --- but when I said "Bottoms up" every plastico steward aboard bent over.
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