virtual crazy gang, part II

[Tmac1720]

are we there yet?... Squeek is getting overly excited although Eric appears rather disinterested in the proposed proceedings. Being advised that while the island is abounding with rats of various persuasions but bereft of Squirrels has rather put a dampener on events for the lad. especially as he had serviced his nuts in anticipation of his run ashore

My suggestion that he stay aboard and do all the inguneers dobying was met with a barrage of un-seaman like language and probably didn't help matters

FYI David, us poor injuneers only have one moth eaten and threadbare boilersuit each and usually are compelled to work "au naturelle" down the pit unless you would care to provide a substantial donation to our clothing fund

[billyboy]

Happy Birthday RED-17 have a good one lass with many any more to come.

[Dartskipper]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

FYI David, us poor injuneers only have one moth eaten and threadbare boilersuit each and usually are compelled to work "au naturelle" down the pit unless you would care to provide a substantial donation to our clothing fund

In my time, any items donated to the motor room clothing fund inevitably ended up as the ginger beers' best oilies. This included the Skipper's best fleecy lined jacket.
He said he appreciated that boiler suits were better with modifications such as extra ventilation apertures, but that was no reason to burn a hole in the sleeve of his jacket. I suggested that he didn't wear it when it was raining, in future, and then I wouldn't have to hang it up to dry. He replied he couldn't wear it any more, because I "Had burnt a ruddy great hole in the sleeve!!" I suggested that if he had avoided the lumpy bits in the sea, his jacket wouldn't have fallen off its hook and dropped onto the hot exhaust pipe flange, just where it wasn't protected by asbestos rope. I mean, I was only trying to help........

[Farmer John]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

are we there yet?

We must be, someone is singing the Sloop John B. But then someone always is. Prob'ly anchored off a white sand beach, our best tenders running folks ashore and beautiful ladies back, whilst keeping a fair balance. This is The Golden Dreamer, you know, no point in not having some good times, we work hard (sorry, I spluttered a bit there) and so we should play hard. Look, Varley just did a perfect dive from the bows into the phosphorescent sea, Tmac is smiling and waving... smiling and waving (put it away, you are spoiling the mood), Sir William is reeling in a large and very edible fish, Tom is polishing his sextant (difficult to see in the dusk), we are all happy and content. Where is the birthday celebrant?

[billyboy]

Steward!...take this to the galley and have it prepared for the BAR-B tomight. Cant beat a nice meaty blue marlin. Oh hello miss, My you look lovely in that nice mini dress. I think that would nice folded over a chair in my suite....Fancy a drinkie?

[Tom Alexander]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY RED-17 Sweet 16 and never been ----- Oh! never mind, I probably won't be correct no matter what I say? Just in case you do turn up at some time, I have a magnum of Dom Perignon in the fridge in the PAX lounge with a rack of cobalt crystal glasses to convey the same 'twixt cup and lip. Nothing but a class act for a classy lassy such as yourself.

[billyboy]

Rack you say Tom......check out the chick on the after deck. That is some rack there mate.

[Tmac1720]

Happy Birthday Red 17, your present is available in my funnel suite when convenient to you

[Dartskipper]

Indeed, Happy Birthday Red 17. Do we call you Red 18 now? (Ducks and weaves heading for the watertight door before the empty Dom Perignon bottle finds its target.....)

[billyboy]

attaboy Dartskipper thats got the party off to a good swing!! (wonder if John from Paignton will join in ha ha ha)
Cheers RED=17 all the best to you and many more birthdays to come.

[Dartskipper]

Looks like Coral Star III coming up astern on the Port Quarter Sir William. I will tell the Plasticos to bring up about four kegs of Special Brew, and maybe another three bottles of Myers'. Don't want John to think we're running a dry ship!

[Tmac1720]

Awwwww Red 17 +1 didn't arrive for her birthday present and I had a lovely red bow tied around it as well

[billyboy]

Originally Posted by Dartskipper

Looks like Coral Star III coming up astern on the Port Quarter Sir William. I will tell the Plasticos to bring up about four kegs of Special Brew, and maybe another three bottles of Myers'. Don't want John to think we're running a dry ship!

[Tom Alexander]

That must have been some party we had ---- all crew have been strangely quiet for the last day or so.

That fellow with the suit and sunglasses popped aboard an hour or so ago and has offered us a lucrative job to take a 40 ft. dry van container full of cash to Colon. It will be delivered on the QT the day after tomorrow. I thought it might be our plastic Canadian money as he mentioned something about a laundry. (Doesn't matter if it gets wet, but does tend to shatter when outside in Winnipeg in February.)

We get two large suitcases stuffed with Yankee $100 bills for out trouble - one now, and the other on delivery.

Now for a little "hair of the dog"

[billyboy]

sounds like my kind of job that Tom......Cheers!!

[Tmac1720]

Originally Posted by Tom Alexander

That must have been some party we had ---- all crew have been strangely quiet for the last day or so.

some of us have been extremely busy tending the up and down squeeze and bang bits that get you to where you want to go.... So therefore when you deckie and radio crowd are safely tucked up all snug and warm with the A/C keeping the temperature constant and comfortable while you study your anatomical "magazines" under the glow of your bedside lamp just remember all this luxury is provided to you due to the unceasing efforts of the injuneering department

Anyhoo we are usually quiet as we can't hear a bloody thing down here

[Farmer John]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

Anyhoo we are usually quiet as we can't hear a bloody thing down here

Tmac, it was you doing the Hokey Cokey and carrying two tin trays (cheap or not, they are battered beyond reasonable use now) for three solid hours round the Monkey Island wearing a purple silk dressing gown and an elaborately feathered hat. Aided, I might add, by almost the whole of the ship's complement, to the tune of "God Save the Queen" played at 78 rpm on the tannoy. I think I was number five in the line, so I saw all the sordid thing. I was being ironic, the rest of you were being noisy.

Right, laundry stowed, ship under way, 1st installment used notes concealed inside a hollowed out copy of "Travels in the desert in search of a rare Orchid", no-one will open that. Colon here we come (don't feel happy shouting that, or even writing it down).

Shh! Listen! Can I hear the strains of "Sloop John B" fading away? I bet I can.

I'll join you Tom, I'm trying to keep a wolf at bay. Hair of the dog be damned, I think I swallowed his complete hide.

[billyboy]

Sniff.....Quick stroll around the boat deck before I turn in for a bit. Nice to take the evening air like this. gets a bit hot and stuffy down there.
*&£"* *%$"£ *&%"£$%£ Clang!!!
Oops, sounds like Squeaks in trouble over something and Tmacs back on form again

[billyboy]

Oh no, Its not Squeak its Eric. Been hiding his nuts in thye drawer Tmac keeps his anatomical magazines in heh heh heh

[Tom Alexander]

Originally Posted by Tmac1720

some of us have been extremely busy tending the up and down squeeze and bang bits that get you to where you want to go....

I was taught that Otto went "Suck, Squeeze, Bang, Blow," whereas with Herr Rudolf it was "Suck, Squeeze, Squirt, Bang, Blow" !!!!

Unless you're running old Jimmy two cycles down there ????

[billyboy]

Ahem...sorry to butt in old chap. But, Our "machinery" in this fine vessel is second to non. I am sworn to secrecy over some of the modifications that are installed down below or in fact what brand of engines they used to be.
Suffice it to say they are in tip top condition due to the extensive maintenance schedule Tmac has drawn up for them. Naturaly I wouldnt expect fresh air crew to understand the technicalitys of what goes on down there in Tmacs emporium.

[Farmer John]

I do know there is a small slot in one part of the engine room, If you feed a £10 note in, you can get insulted in 5 different dialects, and threatened with 2 implements you can choose from an array of hundreds. Wonderful to see.

[Dartskipper]

There's enough noise coming out of the injuneers domain, without firing up any Screamin' Jimmies. (I know American truckers called them Rocky Mountain Humming Birds, but I think they were probably inhaling wacky tobaccy.)

[billyboy]

NOISE!!...My dear chap thats Music to the Mechanically eduficated.

[Varley]

Take a weekend off and someone has a birthday bash! rotters.

However many many Red or as many as you want, anyway.